You met your prince. He is so handsome, loveable and perfect. When you both decided to live together, the fairytale starts to fade away. Your infatuation is over and you start noticing the truth about Mr. Great.

I know that this self-discovery may be very sad and disturbing. You realized that he is not the same anymore. What is more, he is abusing you! One day Mr. Great is back, another day he is a monster. He keeps exploiting and humiliating you in every possible manner. When you want to confront him with the truth, he calls you that you are oversensitive. That makes you even more confused and lost.

Do you know why being a doormat makes you a slave and take your life away from you? Your own traumatic memories bring you negative emotions such as inadequacy, inferiority, stupidity. You feel unattractive and unworthy.

Have you ever heard that it is possible to get out of this mental prison once for all? You will do that by removing negative past memories. So that, you will discover your true authentic self. The natural high self-confidence is back.

What you endured, stays in your mind. Bad memories hypnotized you. Your perception has been distorted and it influenced on how you view yourself, others and your reality. You accepted this as truth and you become this person from your “unhappy dream world”.

Whenever you wish to live in a present moment and be “different”, you turn out that you can’t. You came back to live in your living nightmare again.

How does it all make you feel? I am sure you feel small, hopeless and enslaved. You are fearful to stop this nightmare, it makes you more depressed and doomed to live your life. It destroys your self-esteem more and more.

There is a way to get out of this trap. You can remove painful memories from your mind. These traumatic life experiences stay within your subconscious mind. When you do this, you will reveal the truth about who you are. In other words, you will stop being a doormat any more. It was only a lie!

If you keep asking your heart about who you are, you will find out an interesting answer. Inevitable desires may pop up to your mind. Those wishes are set of positive feelings. You may wish to feel confident, relaxed, self-empowered and independent. You may want to be peaceful and happy. Then, it is not a problem to become an individual who can make healthy relationship choices with ease.

Those positive emotions are part of your true authentic self. The self, you always wanted to be but negative life experience blurred the truth and it made you forgot who you are.

In the Northeast US, there are two species of ticks.

Wood ticks are large and while annoying, do not cause illness. Deer ticks, barely visible to the naked eye, were introduced to the Northeast United States 30 years ago and carry Lyme disease. These microscopic intruders have impacted the outdoors experience almost as much as sprawl.

If I had a nickel for every person who told me that they now limit their outdoor activities to winter to avoid ticks, I’d be a billionaire.

I don’t leave home without my pre-trek preparation, which includes making myself lethal to ticks. So what’s my secret?

A derivative of crushed dried Daisy Chrysanthemum flowers. The insecticidal properties of these plants have been recognized since the 18th century:

Permethrin. It has worked for me for the last 7 years. I specifically mean the pump or spray application for fiber, not a skin cream or ointment.

Permethrin is a chemically synthesized derivative of crushed dried Daisy Chrysanthemum (Chrysanthemum cinerariifolium, more commonly known as Pyrethrum) flowers.

It is available in sporting-goods and camping supply stores. The product available in NY is effective for two-weeks, but there are products on the market that last for up to six weeks.

Here is what I do:

* In a well-ventilated area, apply permethrin to all clothing, headgear, shoes, gloves

* Pay special attention to collars, armpit, waist, knee, ankle areas of garments

* Apply permethrin to backpack, especially arm straps, tent, sleeping bag, stuff sacks

* Let items dry before packing up

Why is Permethrin different than DEET? Permethrin stuns or kills insects that come in contact with it. DEET repels insects by blocking the receptors on an insect’s antennae which help it find its host. Once permethrin has dried on the clothing, it is bound so tightly to the fibers that any potential for absorption through the skin is negligible.

Is Permethrin safe for children and pets? While using the pump or spray, take special care to be away from water sources, ponds, or pet drinking dishes. Permethrin is toxic to fish, but has not been shown to be toxic to birds. Although there are permethrin sprays specifically sold for use on dogs, these products should never be used on cats. Because of their grooming habits and slow metabolism of permethrin, cats are much more susceptible to toxicity from permethrin. Once permethrin has dried on any fabric, it is no longer toxic.

What if permethrin gets on your skin? I typically wash my hands after applying permethrin. Everything I have read indicates that it is poorly absorbed by the skin and inactivated by the skin and liver and excreted. I have a history of acute skin allergies, so I wash my hands.

Can permethrin harm the environment? Some research indicates that permethrin is degraded by sunlight, readily metabolized by soil microorganisms, and that once dried, it is so tightly bound to fibers that it does not melt or leach into the environment.

What other preventive measures can nature-lovers take?

* Know your adversary

Deer ticks cannot jump or fly, and do not drop from above onto a passing animal. Potential hosts (which include all wild birds and mammals, domestic animals, and humans) acquire ticks only by direct contact with them. Once a tick latches onto human skin it generally climbs upward until it reaches a protected or creased area, often the back of the knee, groin, navel, armpit, ears, or nape of the neck. It then begins the process of inserting its mouthparts into the skin until it reaches the blood supply.

* Plan ahead

If I am going to build a debris shelter, I apply DEET (Diethyl-meta-toluamide) to my skin. I would not put DEET on children under 3-years-old. If you are applying DEET to children, a 30% maximum strength is recommended, but consult your pediatrician. Have a tick inspection plan and a tick removal plan.

* Awareness is a survival tool

Ticks that are not attached do not transmit disease. Not all ticks carry infection, and once bitten, it takes 36-48 hours for the tick to begin transmitting the disease.

* Avoid the wrong moves

Touching a tick with a hot match, crushing, twisting, applying petroleum jelly, alcohol or any other irritant are not effective and can increase the risk of infection.

* Practice the right moves

Carry a tick removal kit or a pair of pointed precision, unrasped fine-pointed tweezers whose tips align tightly when pressed firmly together. Practice holding the tweezers, so if you had to, you could grasp the tick by the head or mouthparts right where they enter the skin and pull firmly, steadily and directly outward. Resist the temptation to grab the tick body, jerk or twist to remove it.

* Proper tick disposal

Alcohol does kill ticks. I used to crush them, but I now either wrap them in an alcohol towlette and put that in a container or put them in a jar of alcohol if I find them walking around on me.

* Protect your skin from sun and wind damage

Some people wear long sleeve shirts and trousers, which is certainly effective. I enjoy shorts and tank tops, so I apply at least a 30 SPF sun block. With that, DEET and whatever air borne pollens attach to my skin. I make it a point to wash exposed skin with colloidal oatmeal. If I’m on a long trek, I reapply protection once a day or after swimming. Otherwise, I wash my skin as soon as I get home.

In the summer, I spray my furniture and drapes with permethrin, just in case a tick finds its way inside. I have not seen a tick on me in over two years and have not been bitten by a tick in over five years. Maybe I’m just lucky, but given the way I like to explore, I’m confident these methods are effective.

One surefire way to maintain a low level of self-esteem is to continue to associate with toxic people. So what are toxic people? They are the people that are poison to our lives and our environment. They drain us of our energy, our time, our money, and they can also play havoc with our minds. Toxic people can literally make you physically or mentally ill.

Take a good look at the people around you: family, friends, bosses, co-workers, and anyone else who you interact with everyday. Do you find the people in your life encouraging, supportive, and uplifting, or are they a drain? How do you feel when you’re around the people in your life? If certain people make you feel bad, unattractive, or depressed, they are toxic to you.

You see, sometimes we feel bad and suffer from low self-esteem because we have surrounded ourselves with people who, consciously or unconsciously, have found a way to make us feel bad about ourselves. I believe that the most blatant example of this is a relationship with domestic violence. A woman or man most likely enters an abusive relationship because they have already had some issues with their self-esteem. However, once in the relationship, they must deal with someone who knows all the right psychological buttons to push in order to make them feel continuously bad about themselves.

In these relationships, it gets to the point where the victim starts to feel that being physically and mentally abused is somehow acceptable or deserved. They can even believe that it is often their own fault that the abuse takes place. Therefore, they stay in a relationship where they are abused, and their self-worth continues to dwindle.

More of us than would like to admit are in abusive relationships. Abuse doesn’t have to be physical or overt. Anybody who makes you feel lesser, unhappy about who you are, or unworthy is not someone you should entertain in your circle of friends.

Take a long hard look at the people who you associate with everyday. Many times, our relatives are the ones who make us feel bad and rob us of our energy and feelings of self-worth. So, step back and really look at the people in your life. Instead of asking, “what is the matter with me?” you need to ask, “who is the matter with me?”

Try to associate with people who are going to make you feel good about yourself; people who are empowering and are really on your side are not going to make you feel bad about yourself. They want you to feel good. Try to hang out with people who emit positivity. If you don’t have anyone who makes you feel good right now, then gradually draw yourself away from the people who are making you feel bad and enjoy some alone time while you find techniques, tools, classes, and ways of thinking that will improve your self-esteem.

As you start to feel better about yourself, you’re going to naturally attract people who feel better about themselves; it’s a win-win situation. You will also learn that you – and only you – hold the key to how you feel about yourself.

When trying to figure out why you may have low self-esteem, be sure to take a close look at the people in your life.

If your company works in the industrial sector, industrial cleaners and degreasers are probably a necessity. But that doesn’t mean that you have to endure the effects of dangerous degreaser chemicals. There are thousands of dangerous chemicals found in traditional cleaners and degreasers, some of the most common of which are methyl ethyl ketone, acetone, toluene, glycol ethers, and numerous fluorinated and chlorinated solvents. Until recently, the use of these and other chemicals was necessary to attain high cleaning power. But today, eco friendly solvent supplies offer environmentally preferred solutions that clean as well or better than their toxic counterparts. If you currently use toxic cleaners, switching to environmentally preferred cleaners could do more than save the environment; it could also save your company. Below, examine three reasons why.

The Danger of Hazardous Air Pollutants

Hazardous Air Pollutants (HAPs) are chemicals that evaporate from toxic solutions, harming both the environment and the health of those who inhale them. Some companies attempt to negate HAPs by implementing a superior ventilation system. But if a toxic solution can be smelled-and it always can be-then the presence of HAPs is still there. In the short term, HAPs decrease productivity by causing respiratory distress, vertigo, and stomach sickness. But in the long-term, chronic conditions and illnesses caused by prolonged exposure to HAPs can lead to lawsuits damage a company’s finances and reputation. If you don’t think that toxic material can come back to haunt companies that use them, remember the asbestos debacle, which was costly enough to put some companies out of business.

The Collateral Expense of Toxic Chemicals

Some companies continue to use toxic degreaser chemicals because environmentally safe degreasers cost more. But when you calculate the cost of chemical waste removal, using a fully organic biodegradable degreaser can result in a lower chemical waste disposal bill that saves more money than buying cheaper toxic degreasers, especially if a company performs degreasing on a daily basis. Today, most companies are preoccupied with cost savings and their environmental stance. Switching to biodegradable cleaning solutions can improve both.

The Threat of EPA Regulations

Even if you decide to keep using toxic cleaners, the EPA will eventually regulate or prohibit their use in industrial and commercial settings by regulating or prohibiting one or more or the chemicals they contain. EPA regulations are announced well in advance of their effective dates to allow companies to research appropriate replacements. Companies that fail to do so end up in two unenviable situations: they have a stock of toxic cleaner that they can no longer use or use in sufficient quantities, and they’re forced to implement one or more replacement solutions with no research in place.

Fed up of living for others? Fed up of pleasing others? Life is too short to make it miserable by living in others footsteps. Time to free yourself from those dominating and toxic people, which do nothing less than dragging you to hell. You don’t owe your life to them or they don’t own your life. It is time to take a step away from them. They harm your mental health and cognitive thinking leaving you worthless and with low self-esteem.

Toxic people cast a shadow on you covering you from your surroundings leaving you suffocating. These people first isolate you from your social life. They treat you like you are their very own personal property. They suck your positivity as predators. They prove you wrong in every aspect. They judge you as well as other people in their surroundings; Don’t worry! it is their own way of hiding their complexes. They lack empathy for others and you will rarely find good words in their vocabulary. They are highly selfish; they will only focus on their benefit and will easily crush you down for their benefit without any remorse. They do not admit their mistakes when they are wrong, they lie twisting the whole scenario holding you responsible for every mistake they made. They do not appreciate your work, every time you do something for yourself they envy, and try their level best to pick and point the flaws and let you down.

They damage you, they damage your confidence, control you as if they have every right to you. They have a great audacity to sabotage people around them. They are always the victim they always hold you responsible for the situations they faced. You keep expecting them to change and they keep on letting you down. Lastly, when you speak for yourself and tell them they are disturbing you, and are interfering in your life. They play victims again here as if they haven’t done anything wrong and put you responsible for the whole matter. When they are done destroying you, making you a dead wood, they leave you for no good reason. So, before they leave you, just decide for yourself and leave them before they do, they are not the only pebble on the beach.

Confused? Where to start from and how to start? Are you Afraid? Afraid of making decisions others will laugh at you for your opinions and suggestions saying they are not worth it, huh there only way to drag you back to the misery. Some people are never going to speak in favor of you, so forget it. Step out and cut all ties with the toxic group of fellows, so-called close friend, or dominating relation. Do what satisfies the inner you. If you are satisfied with your work, then all is good. You were not born to please everybody. Be independent forget depending on others stop living in others dreams stop being someone’s pawn. This is your life, get on with it. Own it, speak up for yourself. You have every right to your life. Make decisions for yourself. If someone is stopping you from achieving your dreams, that’s nobody else but you. You have the control of every situation and you can direct your destiny the way you want no one else would do that for you. The more you come under the shadow of destructive critics the more you are heading back.

In case there is a situation where you have to deal with these kinds of toxic people and have to work in an environment where there is no way out, then there might be some ways you can apply in order to minimize their effect on you.

– Firstly, minimize your time of interaction with them.

– Know your boundaries which you would not cross at any matter especially not for these destructive people.

– Learn to say ‘NO’, if you are uncomfortable doing something then just simply say ‘No’. you don’t have to go out of your comfort zone just to please such people.

– Make sure you do not go out of your standards because of these people; be kind, sincere, and caring the way you are.

– Avoid listening to them when they are victimizing themselves, as negativity is contagious it would surround you and you won’t even realize it.

– They are in constant need of attention so they’ll do anything to create a drama so that they can be the center of everyone’s attention. What you can do is run a mile from them at that time.

– Do not take their critics seriously as they will always give you destructive ones, and deflate you.

– Never trust them on anything as they are barefaced liars.

The only revenge you can take from them is to move forward that will burn them into ashes. You don’t need any one’s validation to move ahead. Fling yourself to work, because that is only going to take you far ahead of where you want to see yourself. Be an eager beaver. It is time to create your own reality and go the extra mile. Challenge yourself with new tasks on daily basis. Consistency is the key to success so make sure you are working day to day for what you desire. Create your own goals, be a go-getter, find out your own paths to success, and live for yourself. Remember, not everyone is born with a silver spoon in their mouth, so you have to work for yourself and Leave no stone unturned. Work on your strengths. Surround yourself with the positive people, people that motivate you, that inspire you and appreciate you. The people that know you are worth everything and would like to see you flourish.

Find out your way; find out your very own passion. Uplift your life, and double your working hours. Find out what is the main cause of distraction to work, as understanding the problem is 80% of the solution.The more you rely on others for their opinions you lose the opportunities and self-worth. Nobody will take you seriously. Have a firm belief that you can and you will. Make a decision. At first, there will be a ton of difficulties and ton of inner voices holding you back from positivity, but with time you will adjust and thank yourself for making the right decision that steered you to the pinnacles of success.

Every year millions of pounds of chemicals are sprayed, sprinkled or otherwise spread on residential and business lawns all across the United States. Somehow, as a country of generally “well-off” individuals, we have become obsessed with a picture perfect, weed-free lawn, and we’ve become willing to do just about anything to achieve it.

In fact, most of us have allowed ourselves to be brainwashed into believing that chemical fertilizers are actually safe (or at least safe enough), but nothing could be further from the truth.

No matter what we’re told or how much we may try to delude ourselves, intuitively, we all know that chemical fertilizers, pesticides and herbicides must be harmful. Why else would chemical fertilization companies be required to put those little signs in everyones’ lawns that say “STAY OFF THE GRASS” for X days after application? Why do they wear boots and gloves and masks (the smart ones anyway)? Because it isn’t safe!

So, do you think it is really safe once they remove the signs? No. It is simply saf-ER. The question is, how many exposures to a saf-ER lawn will it take to equal the toxic results of being exposed to an unsafe lawn that has one of those little signs on it?

How many times each week do your children and pets go out and run around and roll in the grass, rubbing those chemicals all over their body and ingesting the dust and/or fumes? “But,” you say, “I don’t have a fertilizer company doing my lawn. I do it myself.” Do you really think that the fertilizer you apply yourself, that you bought at the local nursery or hardware store, is any safer than the fertilizer applied by fertilization companies? Of course it’s not. Let’s be real.

In fact, let’s talk cold hard facts. A study done by the California Public Interest Research Group (CALPIRG) Charitable Trust and Washington’s Safe Food and Fertilizer tested 29 fertilizers from 12 states for 22 toxic metals. Their report “WASTE LANDS: THE THREAT OF TOXIC FERTILIZER” documents the results of these fertilizer samples and demonstrates that the problem of toxic fertilizers is widespread.

Their testing showed that the 29 fertilizers tested contained all 22 toxic heavy metals, many of which are known carcinogens or are considered possible cancer causing agents. Four of these fertilizers were brand name fertilizers marketed to unknowing consumers who generally apply these products in even greater amounts than recommended by the manufacturer. At least one of the fertilizers tested is a MAJOR brand used by a large percentage of commercial lawncare and landscape companies.

Is this really what we want our children and our pets playing on? Toxic waste that is so bad the EPA restricts manufacturing companies from disposing of it directly, but provides a virtual open door if they give it to chemical fertilizer companies as filler material for their so-called “fertilizers”?

Read the report for yourself at their website: Waste Lands: The Threat Of Toxic Fertilizer. Then, use one of the links below to download the free ebook for some sure-fire, low cost secrets to having a beautiful, healthy, NON-TOXIC lawn.

How do you spot a man who is bad news? How can you see his true colours before he’s sucked you in, bled you dry and ripped out your heart?

Sign 1 – He Is Jealous

A real, stand up man is emotionally mature. The moment you sniff jealousy whether you think you are his girl or not, you need to cut all contact. Trust is pivotal, without it you have nothing. There should be no reason for a man to suspect you of doing anything when he has just met you. He has no claim on you just like you have no claim on him. Let me tell you something, men loathe women who they can’t have with a passion. Envy is their disease and you don’t want to be the target of a jealous mans sting. A real man doesn’t see competition, nor does he care about what another man has or what another man looks like. Real men go after what they want – toxic men get their undies in a bunch because they don’t know how to.

Sign 2 – He Exaggerates Mysterious

If you are trying to unravel this guy – and you should be asking questions, like “Do you have a girlfriend?” and his response “I have friends who are girls” or do you have kids “I hang out with kids” you know he is a dodging the truth because he has something to hide. These boys don’t know how to be themselves and couldn’t do it if they tried because their life is one big lie. Trust me he will probably end up lying to you about all kinds of things and for no reason other than it is a muse, a game for him. You need this guy like you need a hole in the head. Don’t waste your time, you are a Queen and only Kings deserve Queens.

Sign 3 – He Attracts Toxic Women

You know what they say, birds of a feather flock together. No A class, top shelf women in her own mind would waste their time on a toxic man and toxic men know this. These men target women who are damaged and don’t believe they deserve love. Two toxic people is a recipe for a disaster, so if you are emotionally weak you should work on yourself and pay particular attention to the men you attract.

It is not uncommon, when coping with great losses, to have a well-meaning friend, acquaintance, or family member say the wrong thing at the wrong time. They may tell you that you need to take a specific action or that it is time to make a particular change and start getting back to being your old self. You know and I know that getting back to being as we were before the loss occurred just isn’t going to happen. Big losses change us.

Again, I emphasize that toxic people think they are doing the right thing and want to help you out. However, we are all products of a culture that distorts the grief process and continues to pass on the myths learned early in life. Sometimes toxic people have an accurate piece of information to convey but the timing is horribly wrong. Or as one actively grieving widow once said to me, “How does she know what my needs are?” Good caregivers are essentially good listeners not tellers of what one needs.

What can we do to cope with the additional stress these unwanted remarks generate? Here are five approaches to consider.

1. As hard as it might be, try to maintain your composure as you respond to the person. To quickly snap back with a stinging remark only heightens your justifiable anger (as well as the physical changes that go with it) and may very well cause a temporary break in your relationship with the person. Of course, much depends on the nature of the remark and the tone of voice in which it was delivered.

2. Try a simple reply such as, “I’m not ready to do that” or “I know you mean well, but I have to make the changes I need according to my timetable.” That may be all that is required. Also, there is nothing wrong if you decide not to respond in any way. Read the situation, and then take the appropriate action.

3. Reduce contact with people who don’t get the message or expect you to follow their agenda for your grief. Their nonverbal communication will give them away every time. When you have to be in their presence, be polite (it will save you much energy) but part company as soon as possible. There is nothing wrong with absenting yourself from a situation where you know you would have to talk to the person for an extended period of time. You are simply caring for yourself.

4. Everyone grieves differently but not everyone knows this important concept. Thus, you may be able to prevent unwanted remarks by telling your caregivers we are all different in the way we adapt. Normalize your grief for them. In short, teach them what your grief is like. Yet, emphasize how much you appreciate all they have done and how grateful you are for their being around your pain and listening to your thoughts. In short, you are educating your support system, even though it is a difficult time for you to be the teacher.

5. Finally, carefully consider the following. Has a person who said something to you that was upsetting experienced a loss very similar to your great loss? For example, was it one widow speaking to another or was it someone who has little or no insight into what you are experiencing? I do not mean to imply that a person who has experienced a similar loss knows your grief.

No one can know another’s grief experience because every relationship is one of a kind. However, is it possible that what the person said to you was something that could be helpful as you proceed in your grief journey? I once heard a widow say, “It takes one to know one” implying there is often compatibility and awareness among those who have suffered similar losses. That person may (and may not) in the long run be helpful to you. You just were not ready to hear whatever was said.

In summary, it is important to be kind in your response to the toxic person. Keep in mind that many potential caregivers are at a loss as to what to say to one who is mourning. They need direction. Often, their sadness in seeing you in so much pain causes them to try to do anything they think is helpful. In the final analysis, only you can decide how much additional pain the person continues to cause by being around you. Because of the stress of grief you may have to limit your conversations or else choose to add to your existing burden.

Children that challenge authority want to be empowered and in power themselves. When I grew up and attended a public school in a large city in a large neighborhood, I learned that children can be very cruel and mean to each other. Research has shown that children that don’t know how to handle conflict with their peers or adults sometimes resort to violent actions that may result in massive harm to others (i.e., through school shootings). These children choose extreme behaviors in order to exert their need to be independent and capable in the eyes of their peers.

Some outward warning signs that teachers should be aware include a refusal of the student to cooperate in the classroom, avoidance of participation in school activities, and consistent attempts to challenge authority. These are all signs of a person who feels self-defeated, has low self-esteem and feels dependent. However, research shows that the child’s actions are protective mechanisms. Professional teachers must try to understand why the child exhibits these types of behaviors. A wise teacher challenges these behaviors and guides the student to a safe and trusting environment.

I was one of these students. I didn’t want to be the center of attention or to be aggressive, but I wanted to fit in and feel accepted by my peers. Fortunately, I had mentors in my life. I recall the pastor at my mother’s church stopping me and saying very encouraging words that have stuck with me: “You are going to be that special someone in life.” His kind words prevented much anger from manifesting in my growing years, because he showed me acceptance in a large and chaotic world. All children need is an encouraging word that they are somebody and that, as a society, we care about them.

Not having mentors and good teachers in my life while growing up in a negative environment would have lefts scars on my psyche.

But teachers must not respond emotionally or be distracted by the ethnicity or size of the student. Reacting to a preconceived idea of their personality does not provide a cure for these students. Instead, be trustworthy and make a connection with them. Never try to shape their behavior but challenge that behavior. Someone once said that what you see on the outside is not the true expression on the inside. Ignore the outside expression, and deal with the person crying out for help.

You may be asking: What does this have to do with the workplace? Well, it’s relevant because there’s almost always conflict in the workplace. It starts when certain behaviors are not immediately responded to. If our problematic childhood behaviors remain unchallenged, then they will be challenged in our adult lives, either by society or your peers in the workplace. This behavior is manifested in bullying, anger, vindictiveness, and screaming.

We all have worked with or heard of adult “babies” in the workplace. Those whose power and attention-seeking make the workplace environment psychologically negative and toxic. This makes work a hellish place that people hate coming to, all because the behavior of the negative person were never dealt with when he or she was a child.

If you’re a supervisor or team leader, have a plan of action for dealing with those who have never outgrown their disrespect for authority. Society is often not lenient, and it will not put up with disrespectful or toxic behavior in the workplace.

Here are my suggestions, based on my experience:

1. Role Modeling – As a supervisor or team lead, you must model the behavior you want your employees or team members to mimic. In the military, we are taught to lead by example. If you want professionalism, loyalty, and good ethical behavior, then be that example. I cannot say this enough. People mimic their environment and their leaders. So, diminish the negative, and embrace positive behavior. Don’t allow favoritism to poison your work environment. Have you ever heard of a “teacher’s pet”? Well, there are also servants to the boss. This behavior diminishes creativity in the employee and lessens the chances that the organization will see its return on investment in them.
2. Focus on the Problem – When you see undesirable behavior in an individual or group, focus on the problem. Do not let it go unattended. In my years of leadership, I have always focused on the problem child who brings that behavior into the workplace. Remember, others are watching how you deal with this unacceptable behavior. So, focus in on it like a laser beam, and zap it out!
3. Counsel the Problem – Once you isolate the problem, isolate the perpetrator, and counsel them. Don’t do it in a negative way. Explain to the individual how her behavior is affecting the organization, team, or the work environment. Remember, you want a harmonious, efficient, and professional workplace.
4. Reinforce Policies and Regulations – Get your organization or team members together and explain to them your organization’s policies, regulations and procedures and how to deal with unwanted behavior in the workplace. By doing this, you are establishing boundaries and providing a stable environment that drives up productivity and profitability.
5. Record your counseling session – Finally, record your counseling session with the individual employee or team members, and outline a plan to administer appropriate punishment if more offenses happen. Remember never to hesitate to carry out your disciplinary plan when a violation occurs.

Dealing with conflicting behaviors in the workplace is a task that should never be taken lightly. It should be dealt with immediately when recognized by all leaders (i.e., teacher, supervisors, team leads or managers). Remember, once toxic behaviors get out of hand, other employees or team members will follow.

Derrick Darden, Ph.D. has been an adjunct faculty member at Park University and Tiffin University teaching management and human resources course for more than eight years. Before this, he served in the U.S. Army for 22 years in the field of Logistics Management. Presently, working for Dept. of Army, Acquisition Contracting Command

A truly non-toxic pot or pan is one that is completely harmless to both the food and the environment. While most conventional cookware leach and react to food during cooking, it’s hard to find the one that doesn’t. All popular materials like metals and ceramics contaminate food. This is because metals are innately reactive and ceramics are laden with inorganic oxides and different chemicals for adding color, polish and finish.

Does Your Cookware Leach? Find Out…

Did you know that there is a home test to check your cookware for toxicity? All you need is a glass of water and some baking soda. A baking soda solution is highly alkaline, similar to most recommended healthy foods. If a cookware leaches while boiling this solution, it will definitely leach while cooking food too. This is the working principle of this test.

How-to Find Out If Your Cookware Is Leaching?

Here are the steps:

Boil 2-3 cups of water in any pot, when it starts boiling add 2 tsp of baking soda. Boil for 5 more mins. Turn stove off.

Wait till cool enough to taste but still warm, then taste the water (take a sip). If you taste metals, that’s what you’re eating! If its leaching chemicals the water will have a rubber/paint like flavor.

For a control, set aside a glass cup of water mixed with the same amount of baking soda, taste that after you have tested the water from the pot and you will see the difference!

If your cookware passes this test – Congratulations! You are cooking healthy. But if it doesn’t, don’t worry, there is a viable alternative:

A Viable Alternative for Non-toxic Cooking

The only known non-reactive material that is being used for cooking is pure clay (a form of primary clay free from any chemical impurities and untreated with chemicals). It is a gift of nature that is healthy for not just food but for the planet as well. Unlike mining and processing of metals and ceramics, the harvesting and processing of clay don’t release any contaminants in the environment. Disposing pure clay pots is also environment-friendly. At the end of their useful cycle which can be decades long, they go back to the same earth where they came from.

There is no other material that can beat these features of pure clay. Food cooked in pure clay is completely free from toxins. Thanks to unique far-infrared heat from pure clay pots – the nutritional value of food stays intact. The water-soluble nutrients (the body needs them on a daily basis) that escape as steam in conventional cookware, stay within an ergonomically designed pure clay pot. It settles back on to the food after cooking is complete – thanks to the excellent steam management of pure clay pots.

These properties of pure clay keep the environment healthy while nourishing our body with essential nutrients – it not only keeps us fit and healthy but also improves our immunity over time. It’s high time we switch to this non-toxic cookware and experience the difference it brings to our health and to that of the planet’s.