If you’re one of the many men around the world who has “caught my girlfriend cheating” you might be feeling so many things at once that you have no idea what to do. Knowing that you are not alone probably doesn’t help much either. The problem is that you probably want to do a lot of things at once and have no idea where to begin.
This is one of those times in life when reason wars with instinct. On the one hand you want to chew through metal, bend trees with your bear hands, and just hit something (OK let’s be honest, you want to hit someone – and that someone has had his hands on your girl, right?).
The problem is that you can’t do any of those things no matter how tempting they may be. Your sense of reason is telling you that but instinct has been the driving force among humans for at least a thousand or two years longer than reason has. In other words, it’s a hard sell when you’ve been hurt, you’re angry, and your pride has taken a beating (even though you didn’t even know you were in the fight).
Now is the time you need to step back, take long and deep breathes, and really figure out how you feel about your girlfriend, your relationship, and her cheating. These are all important details that will help you decide where to go from here.
The first thing most people need to do at a time like this is take a relationship time-out. It’s a much needed break where you can pull it together, get advice from the coach, take stock of the situation, and draw up a game plan for victory. You can set a time limit on your “time out” or have it open ended. You both need this time apart though to see what life is like on your own and how much a part of your lives the other person has become.
A cheating girlfriend is a hard blow for you to take. It probably didn’t instantly alter your love for your girlfriend but it can, and probably did, change how you feel about her to some degree. The problem you now face is figuring out what those changes in the way you feel impact your future together. And, you have to do that before you decide to give things another try. If you aren’t ready to go back to the beginning and start over then it might be too soon to give your girlfriend another chance.
