How to get your ex boyfriend back? This is the discussion that my little sister and her girl friend were having when I came into the room. At first they hesitated to speak in my presence but, I suppose because my sister and I usually spoke openly to each other, they invited me into the discussion. My sister also knew that I had helped some other folks with that very problem so she knew that I had some valuable tips to offer when it came to knowing how to get your ex boyfriend back.

The first thing I did was speak directly to my sister’s friend to find out exactly what was going on with her and her ex boyfriend. It soon became clear that, in an effort to win back her ex, she was in effect smothering him.

You see, she was desperately in love with the guy and in an effort to communicate with him she was constantly phoning him, texting him, and e-mailing him. She was willing to do anything, at every opportunity, just to speak to this man. She was actually embarrassed to tell me that on the few occasions when she did manage to actually speak to him, she became a stuttering idiot as she desperately tried to explain to him how much she loved him.

What I had to explain to her was that all she was doing was pushing him further away with all that exaggerated behavior. I had to make her understand that it was human nature for men (generally) to resist that kind of pressure. It negated their hunter instincts. They preferred to be the ones doing the chasing so that when the ‘prize’ is gotten they can feel proud that they have succeeded in their efforts and have won. All smothering does is help push them further away.

If you want to know how to get your ex boyfriend back, I told her, you have to figure out how to massage his ego. By this I mean that you have to devise a plan to get him to come after you.

The first phase of this plan was to reduce, or better yet break off completely, all contact with him. Will it be easy? No! But it will be the most important part of the overall plan to get your ex boyfriend back. It means no phone calls, no texting, no e-mails, no communication of any kind. And it should ideally go on for about 3 to 4 weeks.

To help distract her so that this period of time would pass with less pain, I advised her to use this time to improve her own personal life. I suggested that she call up some of her old friends and organize some fun activities. This could be activities like going out and making new friends, male and female. I explained that having new male friends would actually increase her confidence in her ability to be comfortable with other people while having clean fun.

Confidence, I explained, is the key when you want to get your ex boyfriend back. The more confident you are the more fun you will have. The more fun you have the happier you should be. The happier you are the easier it would be to attract meaningful people into your life and, more importantly, be more attractive to your ex boyfriend.