Women love alpha males. It’s not like it’s a secret or anything. They are irresistibly attracted to the leader of the pack, at least the emotionally stable women, the women you want.

An alpha male epitomizes masculinity. He is a leader in life and confident around women and people in general. Women want to be around him because he makes them feel good. Ultimately, these are traits you need to develop and hone over time to pull that sexy kitten and keep her purring for as long as you want.

The key element that separates an alpha male from the so called “beta male” is his mindset. Your chance of success with women and dating is directly correlated to your attitude.

Consider the following two examples:

A frustrated geek: “I feel nervous. She is going to know I’m nervous. What if she rejects me? What if people see me being rejected?”

Rampant thoughts like these are often running through the beta male’s mind. This kind of negative attitude causes him to lose the game even before any attempt has been made. The lack of confidence seeps out into his body language and mannerisms. Women can sense this a mile away and his chances of success are lowered, significantly, even before making a move.

Conversely, consider the following example:

An alpha male: “I’m a catch. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain by approaching that foxy blonde. If she rejects me, that’s her loss.”

In this example, the alpha man has a strong positive attitude. His mind is clear, free of self-limiting beliefs. Even if he does get rejected, he has already created a type of inner shield against rejection.

Before delving into the nuts and bolts of meeting women, you should first spend some time to focus on yourself, not on women. What happens on the inside is usually a better determiner of success than what you say or how you look like on the outside. Learning and developing an alpha male mindset is the first step to improving your dating reality and getting the results you deserve.

Thoughts Are Real

First of all, understand that thoughts are real. Thoughts tend to manifest themselves in the real external world. For example, think sports psychology in which athletes use positive visualization to physically and literally improve performance. Anything that you think of or imagine can be realized externally.

Your thoughts also directed related to your emotions…

Emotions are extremely powerful drugs running through our system. They tend to manifest themselves in our communication (verbal and non-verbal), voice tone and overall personality, however subtle. We all know how hard it is at times to hide feelings of nervousness or insecurities. There is a very real and strong connection between your habits of thought and who and are as a person. You really are what you think you are.

Secondly, you need to take responsibility for your own thoughts. Understand that you, and ONLY you, are responsible for your own daily inner dialogues. Once understood correctly, this is a very empowering realization. Why? Because it means that you do have a certain level of control over your emotions, and can therefore choose the type of person you want to be.

So, how exactly do you develop this alpha male inner game and become an alpha male, the person women instinctively respond to?

Remove Self Limiting Beliefs

Before you can reprogram your mind into a more confident alpha male, you will need to develop awareness of your daily thought habits. Pay attention to your inner dialogues that are constantly running through your head day to day. Writing your daily thoughts down in a journal is helpful in keeping track of your inner game progress. You’ll discover that you do have control of your thoughts and how they can change over a short period of time.

Before you can remove any self limiting beliefs, you first need to develop self awareness.

“Life sucks”.

“I hate my job”.

“Girls don’t like me”.

“She will probably reject me anyway”.

“She probably already has a boyfriend”.

Repeating negative self talk such as these examples above tend to pile up in your subconscious mind. Repeated negative thoughts become harder to undo as time goes by. The longer the negative habit, the harder it is to overcome it. Think of it as a river. The longer this river stream flows, the deeper the tracks are imprinted and the longer it’ll take to get the water flowing out in a new direction.

A simple, yet effective technique you can use to remove these self limiting beliefs is by consciously replacing them with positive affirmations. Take the example “I am becoming an ultra confident alpha male.” At first, your mind might reject this thought because it’s not used to you saying it. However, try repeating this phrase for a couple minutes, several times a day, for a couple weeks. Then one day, you will catch yourself doing something that you have never done before, like walking up to that hottie sitting in the coffee shop and naturally initiating a conversation. It’s very important that you visualize and feel your affirmations for maximum results. Just repeating an affirmation, without visualizing and feeling it will not help you much.

Whatever thought you’d like to become reality, repeat it in the affirmative as opposed to the negative. For example, don’t say “I am not afraid to approach women.” Your unconscious will ignore “not” and the words “afraid” will constantly be drilled into your mind and associated with “approaching women.” Instead, try using something like “I enjoy approaching women.” Over time, the mind will start to anchor “approaching women” with the word “enjoy” instead of “afraid.” Then, once you’ve finished approaching that girl in the book store and had some time to analyze your performance, you are more likely to remember the experience as “enjoyable,” regardless of how well it went. The new experience will mold in a new, more positive mental “river stream” and you will be more likely to approach another girl the next time. Your new, more constructive mental thought becomes habit and the previous negative mental habit fades away. You become more emotionally intelligent and your confidence is raised. The positive cycle then deepens with added attempts, further increasing your self esteem and attractiveness to women.

The best time to train your mind with affirmations is before falling asleep. This is best since your body is most relaxed and your mind is most receptive, easily accepting thoughts as reality.

Give it a try, but you might need to give it some time before you notice results, especially if you’ve your glass is half empty more than not.