Dance Central is an all new Xbox 360 game; perfect for any anyone interested in having fun while learning new dancing moves. Created by a partnership of MTV Games and Harmonix, this new dance game was designed by the same group that launched the popular Rock Band game.

Thanks to the newly developed Kinect sensor technology, this new game will translate your movements into an avatar onscreen. Unlike other gaming systems, remote controls are not necessary. In other words, the Kinect camera technology system will recognize your every body movement and convert them onto the screen. The system is also able to respond to voice commands and can pick up even the smallest hand and face gestures as you move and groove playing the game.

Furthermore, the game is ideal for experienced and beginner dancers alike. The user-friendly Break it Down program, can be used by amateurs for easy step by step instructions. The game shows you where to place your feet and when and you copy the steps with instant feedback from the system.

On the other hand, people who prefer to start with the choreography, can begin right away and learn as they go. Dance Central is similar to other Kinect dancing games, in the sense that the performer is constantly scored throughout his or her routine. The scoring system is presented alongside a multiplayer option, so players can compete against each other for additional enjoyment. In order to achieve a high score, a player must accurately mimic the onscreen dancer’s movements.

The game has been released with 32 songs that go along with over six hundred different dancing moves and techniques. Also, this program conveniently integrates those movement into ninety various routines. The large variety of popular artists allows it to appeal to the general public. This game features bands such as Commodores, with old favorites like “Brick House”. Also, contemporary tracks from the famous Lady Gaga can be found in the game, like the popular song “Poker Face”. In short, Dance Central is an enjoyable family centered game that is appealing to all people regardless of age.

‘Titanic’ is a love story that captures the romance of two young lovers as the tragedy of the doomed vessel, RMS Titanic, unfolds around them. It was released in 1997 and was a great commercial and critical success, winning 11 Academy Awards (the first to do so since ‘Ben Hur’) and 3 Grammys.

It was was written, directed, co-produced, and co-edited by James Cameron, who also won the Academy Award for best director. ‘Titanic’ became the highest grossest movie of all time, earning $1.8 billion at the box office, until it was surpassed in 2010 by ‘Avatar’, another movie by James Cameron.

The story concerns two young people from different social classes – Leonardo DiCaprio appears as Jack Dawson and Kate Winslet has the role of Rose DeWitt Bukater – who fall in love while aboard the doomed maiden voyage of the Titanic in 1912. Although the love story is fictitious, many of the characters – crew and passengers – were based on those who were actually aboard the real vessel.

For instance, the brash Margaret “Molly” Brown (played by Kathy Bates) was famous for her heroic efforts (not shown in the movie) of trying to save drowning passengers. She later became known as the “Unsinkable Molly Brown”.

There were many scenes in the movie, although only briefly touched on, which added greatly to the emotional impact of the inevitable sinking on passengers and crew. Two historical characters were Isador and Ida Strauss. Isador was a former owner of R.H. Macy and Company and was also a former NY Congressman. In the movie, his wife Ida has a chance of leaving the ship in a lifeboat but declines and returns to her husband, saying she will honor her wedding vow and remain with Isidor. She is last seen embracing him as they lie on a bed in their stateroom, with the water rushing in.

Layers of emotion are added with other scenes that depict obvious heroism by crew members. Joseph Bell, the Chief Engineer, and his men work desperately until the last moments to maintain the power for lights and so distress signals can be sent. All are lost.

Wallace Hartley, the bandmaster, and his orchestra, continue to play uplifting music to the very end, even as the ship sinks.

The two lovers, Rose and Jack, initially come together when he rescues her from a suicide attempt brought about by her despondency at a loveless engagement, having been pressured to marry a wealthy suitor, Cal, because of her family’s financial needs.

Jack is scorned as inferior by Rose’s mother and Cal but he does manage to attend a stuffy first-class dinner, where he renews his acquaintance with Rose and their bond deepens.

The next day, Rose defies her mother and Cal and goes to the bow of the ship where she meets Jack, realizes her feelings for him and the two passionately embrace. They then go to the privacy of Rose’s stateroom and she asks him to sketch her wearing only the Heart of the Ocean, a blue diamond necklace which was an expensive engagement gift from Cal. She later leaves the sketch in Cal’s safe.

While attempting to escape from Cal’s bodyguard, Rose and Jack enter the cargo hold where they enter one of the cars stored there and make love on the back seat.

They witness the collision with the iceberg and overhear the lookouts discussing how serious it is. Rose and Jack decide to warn her mother and Cal but, in the meantime, Cal has discovered the nude sketch of Rose and furiously plants the necklace on Jack; then accuses him of stealing it. Jack is arrested and taken below deck, where he is handcuffed to a pipe.

The emotional elements of the ‘Titanic’ are very powerful, with the later scenes showing the aftermath of the collision, the desperate attempts of those aboard to find shelter on a lifeboat, or the brave acceptance of their fate. As there were not enough lifeboats, more than 1500 passengers and crew perished in this catastrophe. Throughout, the musical score strongly reflects their feelings and the dangers they face. The closing song, ‘My Heart Will Go On’ (sung by Celine Dion) won an Academy Award and two Grammies. Following the success of ‘Avatar’, a 3-D version of ‘Titanic’ will also be released.

These epochs of advanced technologies and the World Wide Web calls for instantaneous solutions, whatever the quandary may be; so, if you are an online bingo enthusiast, you ought to find a pertinent web gaming portal which fulfills every criterion of yours. Since bingo-games on the internet do not take into account constraints based on physical location, language, gender, age bracket or any other relevant limitation. Its popularity has never seen a low phase.

Instead online bingo is all the rage among populaces all across the earth. Some of the most fascinating aspects of the game are the incorporated chat facility and the fact that anyone can plat online bingo and that too absolutely free of charge. The built-in chat facility facilitates your social side of your virtual avatar by letting you chew the fat with other players from different parts of the globe. The bare necessities to start enjoying free online bingo are a computer and an active internet connection.

The moment you sign up for the online bingo games, you will avail huge sign up bingo bonus which can be made use to play a plethora of bingo-games. Ask any die hard bingo aficionado and you are sure to get a review of the game which points out that the experience proffered by bingo-games is unsurpassed in the niche gaming industry. With a lot of variances of bingo games being introduced in the current gaming scenario, equipping one self with apt know how and acquaintance pertaining to rules and regulations of that specific game is highly advisable.

There are a lot of websites on the World Wide Web which proffers real cash money for winners. And there are some web gaming sites which ask for money deposit before you can enjoy an enticing game of online bingo. Apt caution should be maintained and the web site’s payment gateways should be checked relevant to their security aspects before you further indulge yourself.

The best part on the internet relevant to bingo games is that you will find scores of web gaming portals which proffer free online bingo for you, so that you do not have to spend a penny to enjoy a heart content game of bingo from the comfort of your home. The similitude of the online bingo-game to its land based counterpart also makes the transition phase easy for most folks who are experts at the land version bingo-game but know little of the online version.

What “I Love You” Doesn’t Mean

Finally he says he loves you. You are fired up. And you’ll think things will be smooth-sailing from this point on, right?

Mmmm…not so fast. I’m gonna have to break the news to you and it may not be what you want to hear: when guy says he loves you, often times it doesn’t mean anything. He’s just in the moment and being expressive about his feelings which you want, right? He loves you, you’re fun, sexy, beautiful and wonderful and making him happy, but -at this point- it doesn’t mean he wants to marry you or even have a relationship with you!

Seriously?

Yes, so read on…there is more news that will boggle your mind even more about the male psyche.

The Reasons Why He Pulls Away

When he says he loves you he’s telling you the truth. That’s how what he is feeling at that particular moment. He adores you, he is attracted to you and he’s probably feeling in love with you too though it may also be induced with chemical cocktails released during first stage of courtship. It’s all new and exciting and he’s caught in the moment.

What he does after that declaration is what actually matters. And it ranges from nothing changes to a new level of commitment.

Unfortunately for most women though, that love declaration changes everything. It changes the dynamics of relationship and for sure the expectations. More often that not this “L” word messes our heads up. We become so consumed by the thought and act so anxiously that it often switches off a few of his attraction bulbs for us.

So what do you need to do when you hear that? You’ll be feeling good for at least a few days before you become “a new person” to him. Suddenly you act so needy and demanding. You are suspicious and wanting more of his time and attention. You act like a girlfriend even though there is still no discussion about commitment or even exclusivity! You are on an unstoppable highway ride to blissful happily-ever-after without his consent and cooperation.

And you can imagine what will happen next. He pulls away.

Yes a guy can declare his love for you at various points of courtship before or after exclusivity and depending where he is in his life, “I love you” doesn’t necessarily mean he’s ready to be exclusive for you either! Maddening, isn’t it?

What is a girl to do in such situation?

Remain calm and being who you have always been. Don’t change a bit. A way to seduce his mind is by making him think of and wonder about you. You can only do that by maintaining a bit of an aura of being an enigma that will keep him guessing. You can only do this when you have a full life, are in love with life and have mastered the art of self-love.

It’s interesting that when you don’t initiate “the talk,” usually men do because they’re so frickin curious: why isn’t this broad asking me where this is going yet like the rest of them? I have had two men actually did that after my breakup. Before the guy I’m dating told me he loved me, the same night he was fishing where I stood when it came to marriage/relationship. And as I acted as “que sera sera” as he did, he felt safe to blurt that “L” word.

If you have done all the right things and he still pulls away, don’t despair or go into the panic mode. There is also another reason why men pull away and it’s nothing to do with his love and attraction for you. A man can in fact be so in love with you but still he feels the urge to pull away and even leave the relationship. It has everything to do with what’s called the 4 Male Hero Avatar Principles.

If this is what is happening to your relationship now, read this carefully and take all necessary actions to reverse the situation:

What A Man Needs to Commit

A goddess knows how to perform the love jiujitsu: it’s not using force or ultimatums, but a man’s own masculine essence that makes him think that the idea comes from himself to be with you and commit to you.

There are a lot of toddler bedding sets that are available out the in the current market. If you actually take the time to go through the catalogues or the online sales page of such sellers and distributors, you sure can find such sets that would not only make our kid happy but ones that would definitely make your wallet happy too.

Of late, it has become quite important to teach kids to be self reliant and independent. This particular trend had led to kids being given a separate room thereby helping them understand the need to respect a person’s private space. Just providing the room alone would not provide the necessary lessons for your kids. Rather, the right toddler bedding sets and right room décor would definitely help you in this endeavor.

Lets us say that your child is in the Buzz Light-year phase or even the Avatar phase, following the movies, you still can find kids bedding sets based on the same themes. When you get such bedding sets, you would get the whole set along with matching pillow and bed covers too. All that you would have to do following this purchase is ensure that the room is also decorated in accordance to the theme. This would encourage your child to spend more time in that room. With time, your child would actually learn to be more self-reliant and independent.

Let’s face the truth; such phase for kids usually is short lived until the next movie is released. In such cases just make certain that the actual toddler bedding set is neutral while the covers and the posts are changeable in accordance to our child’s taste.

With the right choice of toddler bedding sets, you can be rest assured to teach your child all the valuable lessons easily.

Trang-Oul’s Girth (Set Troll Belt)

Defense: 134-166

Minimum Strength: 91

Level Requirement: 62

+75-100 Defense (varies)

Requirements -40%

Cannot be Frozen

Replenish Life +5

+25-50 to Mana (varies)

+30 to Maximum Stamina

+66 to Life

Cold Resist +40% (3 items)

Analysis: This belt, when worn without any other items from the Set, has no bonuses to Resistances. However, it does have a very big bonus to Life along with the always-good-to-have Cannot be Frozen mod. Worn alone, Trang-Oul’s Girth might not seem so attractive, but if you wear two other items from the set, you get a very nice +40% to Cold Resistance. 

Trang-Oul’s Claws (Set Heavy Bracers)

20% Faster Cast Rate

Cold Resist +30%

+30 Defense

+25% to Poison Skill Damage

+2 to Curses (Necromancer Only)

Analysis: This pair of gloves is perhaps the most useful for non-Necromancers out of all the items in the entire set. The 20% Faster Cast Rate just screams ‘Caster gloves’ while any character can enjoy the +30% to Cold Resistance. The 25% to Poison Skill Damage is a major boost in damage to anyone who uses a Poison Skill (mainly the Necromancer, but the Assassin and Druid also have Poison Skills to use). And of course, Necromancers get the wonderful +2 To Curses.

Trang-Oul’s Wing (Set Cantor Trophy) (For Necromancers Only)

Defense: 175-189

% to Block: 60%

Minimum Strength: 50

Level Requirement: 54

+125 Defense

30% Increased Chance of Blocking

Poison Resist +40%

Fire Resist +38-45% (varies)

+15 to Dexterity

+25 to Strength

+2 to Poison and Bone Skills (Necromancer Only)

-25% to Enemy Poison Resistance (3 items)

Replenish Life +15 (4 items)

Analysis: This grisly Shield can only be equipped by Necromancers, and thus only Necromancers can ever wear the full Trang-Oul’s Avatar Set. Right off the bat, it has relatively low Strength requirements so you can wear it as soon as you reach the minimum level requirement. Not only that but it grants you a +25 bonus to Strength and a +15 bonus to Dexterity, which will help you with the Strength/Dexterity requirements of other equipment you might come across. The high boosts to both Poison and Fire Resistance add to the usefulness of Trang-Oul’s Wing. If a Necromancer uses this, and wears two other items, he can even break the immunity of Poison Immune monsters due to the -25% to Enemy Poison Resistance. 

Set Bonuses: 

Partial Set Bonuses

+18 to Fire Ball (2 Items)

Regenerate Mana 15% (2 Items)

+13 to Fire Wall (3 Items)

Additional Regenerate Mana 15% (3 Items)

+10 to Meteor (4 Items)

Additional Regenerate Mana 15% (4 Items)

Full Set Bonuses

+3 to Necromancer Skill Levels

20% Life Stolen per Hit

+3 to Fire Mastery

+10 to Meteor

+13 to Fire Wall

+18 to Fire Ball

+200 Defense

+100 to Mana

Regenerate Mana 60%

Replenish Life +5

All Resistances +50

Transforms into Vampire (see Summary Below)

Final Summary for Trang-Oul’s Avatar:

The Trang-Oul’s Avatar Set Items have good stand-alone mods for the most part. The Set also has attractive Individual Item Set Partial Bonuses, Entire Set Partial Bonuses and Full set Bonuses, and the class that most benefits from these bonuses are Necromancers. Wearing the Full Set even transforms your Necromancer from pale-skinned human into a quick-moving Vampire onscreen.

Note: In regards to wearing the Full Set, and then turning into a Vampire, it should be noted that when this happens, the Necromancer will find that his casting delay has increased, resulting in slower casting of his Skills. This is a bug, and has been reported to Blizzard.

Note 2: Should a Sorceress wear up to four pieces of Trang-Oul’s avatar, she will only receive Partial Set Bonuses with a maximum cap of +3 to Fire Ball, Fire Wall and Meteor (as opposed to +18, +13, +10 respectively). This is due to the fact that these skills are native to Sorceresses.

As a serious lottery player who wants to learn how to win the Pick 4 lottery one needs to look to purchase a system of Pick 4 strategies from someone who is trusted. The system’s author should be identifiable both by name and photo. The author(s) should also have one contact page available to interact with the lottery players who purchase the lottery system. This not only demonstrates trust between the author(s), seller, lottery players and buyers, but it also provides a sense of reassurance in the event something goes wrong.

Every consumer feels reassured in purchasing any product if they know that they have the name of one person that they can identify and contact in the event there is a problem with the purchased product. Printers have made good money over the years printing up business cards to make such connections between sellers and buyers. It is reassuring that you have a name and number to call if any problems arise as well as providing good customer service to the clientele.

Think of those in your lifetime that have given you a business card starting with the doctor, lawyer, dentist, insurance agent, automobile salesperson, real estate agent, appliance sales person, and even clergy, to name a few.

All these individuals are also known to the buyer by facial recognition. They have had face to face encounters. Direct contact has personalized the relationship between the buyer and the seller.

On the internet, this is not always the case. There are avatars or images that are available to the author of Pick 4 lottery strategies to hide behind. If there is no contact page available, then there is no interaction between buyer and seller. The buyer may be in line at the grocery store right behind the seller and the buyer would never know that the person in front of him was the person who sold him those Pick 4 strategies that were suppose to teach him how to win the pick 4 lottery.

Who is perceived to be the more credible seller? The one who has his or her picture on the website and provides a contact page, or the seller who has an avatar or nameless photo and no contact page available. Many business cards today have the person’s picture right on the card. Why wouldn’t the Pick 4 seller want the public to know who he or she is?

One of the biggest complaints that Pick 4 players have voiced over the years after purchasing someone’s program is that they never can contact the seller. He or she isn’t reachable and there is no email address available to contact the author or seller. They just take your money and you never hear from them again. How does this help the author’s credibility with the buying public?

The real picture and contact page is the equivalent of an internet business card. If anything goes wrong you can contact the seller. The saying goes that a picture is worth a thousand words.

The author’s picture provides the buyer the opportunity to accept or reject the sale based on the impression it makes. The buyer decides if he or she appears trustworthy.

It is hard enough to learn how to win the Pick 4 lottery with newly purchased Pick 4 lottery strategies without adding the issues of trust and how to contact the author.

What happens if “I can’t download the product” after purchasing it? Who does the lottery player talk to if anything that was promised in the purchased system was not delivered? Who can the player turn to ask questions that arise regarding the implementation of the Pick 4 strategies? Are players left at a dead end if there is no contact page?

First and foremost, this amounts to customer service and trust not only in the product but also the seller. If the seller and the product offer good customer service, then buyers will have more confidence and be more willing to purchase a system of Pick 4 strategies on how to win the Pick 4 lottery. It suggests to buyers that this particular seller is more trustworthy because of his or her availability.

On the other side of the coin, do authors of Pick 4 lottery strategies without a contact page or a personal photo appear less trustworthy to buyers, namely the Pick 4 players?

Let’s assume you are the Pick 4 player who wants to learn how to win the Pick 4 lottery. Wouldn’t you want to see the sellers internet business card on his or her website?

James Cameron’s Avatar has gotten people remembering the last major film the director had made before coming up with the said SciFi film. Titanic was the blockbuster hit that took over the world thus imprinting in each of our memory the story of Jack and Rose. With this, a mashed up trailer was made creating a said sequel to this story Titanic Two the Surface by Robert Blakenheim aka Derek Johnson. This was followed by another sequel to the sequel trailer Titanic 3: Never Let Go by Margaret Devaney, however please take note that this Margaret is just a pseudo inspired by the real Margaret: a true to life survivor of Titanic.

Margaret Delia Deveney shows that she was around 19 or 20 when she boarded Titanic at Queenstown. She came from Kilmacowen, County Sligo, Ireland, which she decides to leave to settle in New York where a brother and two sisters living. She entered Titanic as a third class passenger with two friends coming from the same hometown: Maria Delia Burns and Kate Hargadon.

In the interview she took in 1973, she gave a background check of the night Titanic came in collision with the iceberg. She recalled an older male friend had alerted her and her two friends about the disaster and decided to investigate it at the aft deck. Upon confirming they went back to their cabins to claim their lifejackets unfortunately the gate to the Second Class was locked which made them decide to climb the ladder from the Arf Well deck to the said class’ station.

Along the way one of the girls went seasick and decided to stop. The other friend stayed to wait with their sick friend while Margaret proceeded to check for a boat, intending to return for them after she had located one. Unfortunately, when she got to the top, the commotion got her pushed inside the boat which made her unable to return for her friends. As the boat was about to be lowered it got caught on the ship’s rivet. To help get them loose, Margaret lent the man in-charge of the boat, her pocket knife to cut the collapsible free.

After her rescue, tenant screening traces Margaret to have lived in New York and got married to John Joseph O’Neil in 1919. They later on relocated to New Jersey and had six children (one of them, Helen, presently living in Clifton, New Jersey).

Margaret frequently gave interviews about the Titanic as background check. She was one of the survivors who attended the premier night of the film A Night to Remember in its New York premier.

After her husband died, Margaret moved to Clifton, New Jersey. At the age of 82, on June 12, 1974, she passed away and was buried in Holy Name Cemetery, New Jersey.

At present the knife which was used help the boat let loose is but one of the relics she kept from Titanic incident. Together with her ticket which was kept in the pocket of her sweater which she was wearing that night, and the flag which was given to her by the man in charge of the boat she was in-given to her out of gratitude while they were in the Carpathia-Margaret’s descendants still keeps them as treasures from the Night that changed millions of lives.

Margaret’s legacy and her story, along with those who survived the tragedy, will always be remembered and kept hold. She may not be the Margaret who made the second trailer of the so called sequel to the sequel, but that alone is proof that she was part of something that made people realize how should be appreciated every second of one’s life.

This Complete incarnation of Divinity was not Uninvited but was the result of prayers by the Yogis of Highest order, Saints and Sages across Lands.

As in previous incarnations, The Avatar chose the Blessed Land of Bharat for this Advent. He was born on 23rd.11. 1926, in Puttaparti ( a small village, now a Global City where people from all over the Globe come to see the ONLY ONE, without a SECOND ). He is the Re-Incarnation of Sri Shirdi Sai Baba.

The Supreme Master Sai Baba, in his early days as a little boy known as Satya Narayan Raju, is the Truth of Truths, God of Gods & The Soul residing every heart. He is God come in Human Garb.

The Sweet Master’s work is continual; he is Love personified and is the Ever Blissful Atman. Sathya Sai Baba is Lovingly the Master of all Hearts, the chit chora of his devotees.

To those who have experienced his divinity (by his Grace alone), know him as The Eternal Sutraman.

To those who are yet to know him, will know him as Adi Purusha. And to those who do not wish to know Satya Sai, will still someday come to know him as the Answer to the Question they have deep in their heart.

Satya Sai Baba’s ways are Beyond Comprehension and a Glimpse of his Glory can be read in his Biography ‘ Satya Sivam Sundara’, Which means Truth, Auspiciousness & Beauty. He guides and cures in Dreams, in Visions, in Direct Presence & through ways which are known as Miracles. Every Devotee lives under the umbrella of his grace. Each devotee has a story to tell as to how Bhagwan Baba changed his Life Completely.

Bhagwan Sri Sathya Sai Baba never PERFORMED any Miracles as people claimed, But MIRACLES HAPPEN WHEN HE WILLS. Every student of Sri Satya Sai School & Colleges, & every Sai Devotee can write Volumes on their Experiences which are known as Transcendental Gifts of Grace.

Bhagwan Sri Satya Sai Baba has always said ‘ I have not incarnated to establish a religion, nor do I wish to disturb any belief; You continue worshipping the deity chosen by you, worship the form the you adore in your heart and you will ultimately come closer to me only. For all Names & Forms belong to me’, If you are a hindu, be a good Hindu; If you are a sikh, be a good sikh; if you are a muslim, be a good muslim. The definition of Good by Sai Baba is that you follow the norms of your religion and your conduct is righteous, you do not decry any religion and treat all religions as routes to reach the One Supreme Being which is the Ultimate Goal of all Lives.

As a coach, one of the more typical causes of problems encountered with my clients is the all too common human desire to be perfect or to perform perfectly. Defaulting to this desire to be and do perfect will encumber both the client and the coach. Better to focus on striving for doing and being excellent in our performance. There is more than just a semantic difference between the words perfect and excellent. There is also an energetically experienced difference that can either compel greater performance or stop it altogether.

When striving for perfection there is no room for error. The outcome is black or white. The performance, project, result or objective was either delivered according to specification or it wasn’t. Often, nothing can (or does) happen performance wise until perfection has been attained. Continual refinement accompanied with continuous judgment becomes the order of the day. Interestingly, none of the traditional measures of perfection will typically include as a top level question “does it work or not”?

Functionally speaking, excellence refers to workability. Something is excellent when it performs or when it works in a way that creates a minimum of unintended consequences and it gets a large measure of the desired results. In this sense, it’s elegant. It’s not perfect, yet it functions extremely well.

The advantage of focusing on excellence rather than perfection is that doing so keeps the action moving forward. What we are essentially doing as a coach is working to create an environment that makes it possible for the client to live into their outcome rather than live up to an arbitrary standard of what that outcome should be and how it should be attained. This distinction is energetically one of literally moving forward (living into) versus standing still (living up to).

As a coach it is useful to be familiar with some of the qualitative differences that separate these two performance approaches. As you might expect, perfection has some extremely strong dynamics associated with it. Some are so strong that they can literally shift the focus away from performance. Chief amongst these are the following:

• Focus on protection of a valued self image where there is no room for error

• A pervasive mood in lifestyle in which the client operates out of fear (i.e., not being good enough, not measuring up, being “found out”, etc.)

• Major risks are either avoided or highly calculated

• Obsession with a need to control and be “right”

• Critical judgment of self and others against an arbitrary standard

• Scarcity of choices… do it by “the book”

• Focus on protecting what I’ve already got – playing not to lose versus playing to win

• Focus on mechanism vs. creativity

• Primarily concerned about “looking good”… a “me” focus

• Narrowing of focus that allows for seeing only the chosen path to the outcome to the exclusion of other possibilities

• Classic win/lose approach to relationships

As you can probably imagine, over time a focus on being (or doing) perfect also creates telltale hallmarks in and with the “body” of the individual. We’ll explore the notion of “body” far more fully later in the book. Suffice it to say at this point that I use the term “body” to include not just the physical but, as well, the energetic, the emotional, the mental, and the spiritual bodies we inhabit. Within this context of “body”, a perfection approach sets up a state whereby constriction, rigidity, narrowness of focus and a general mood of judgment will almost always be experienced by the individual and those around him or her. This is not an insignificant consequence. Inasmuch as one aspect of leadership we attend to as a coach is the quality of movement our client engenders in themselves and their followers this movement is strongly influenced by the leader’s “body”.

As an alternative, a focus on excellence can be seen as having the following basic attributes:

• Willingness (even a desire) to learn from mistakes. From this perspective, what are generally called mistakes are seen as unavoidable, even desired, information gathering opportunities. (I’m reminded of the comment of Soichiro Honda, founder of Honda Motor Company, when asked about the secret to his success – “I made as many mistakes as I could as fast as I could”)

• Action based on excitement, energy, fun, enthusiasm

• Willingness to take challenging risks

• Operate in life from clarity of purpose and empowerment

• Readily operates from acceptance and appreciation of differences

• Seeking of feedback and diversity of input

• Utilizes creativity and acknowledges the abundance of choice

• Dual focus on the journey as well as the results

• Concern for the greater good… an inclusionary “we” focus

• Establishes win/win based outcomes

Similar to the dominant focus being on perfection, having the dominant focus on being (or doing) excellent will also create telltale hallmarks in and with the “body” of the individual. These will generally manifest as a relaxed and open body and mind. Approachable and curious are words often used to describe someone with this orientation. Shoulders will tend to be relaxed, eyes will tend to be softer, and, internally, the voice of criticism will be dampened. Not surprisingly, this “body” impacts the external world in a way that is likely to foster a quality in the movement amongst the followers of a leader that is materially different from that of the perfectionist leader.

Having said all of the above I want to be sure to point out that I’m not speaking here of abandoning standards or of abandoning a commitment to continuously improving. One can have extremely high standards and still be coming from a position of excellence. In this case, the difference between the two perspectives is the answer to the question “for the sake of what?” do these standards exist. With an approach rooted in excellence, the answer to the question is going to be tied to the desired outcome that the standards makes possible. With an approach rooted in perfection the answer to the question will tend to be because the standard itself is important – often as important as the actual outcome. Again, it’s really a question of what does achieving the standard make possible?

To use a sports example to illustrate this difference one need look no further than the efforts by champion golfer Tiger Woods to continuously refine and improve his swing. To some, it could look as if he is being a perfectionist. However, within the framework of excellence versus perfection it is my position that Tiger is operating from a position of excellence. He is not standing still; his efforts to improve are for the sake of being the best golfer that has ever played the game; he is not concerned about appearing less than to others when he is in the throes of the rebuilding process – he’s learning. It’s a generative as well as a productive process for him.

This opens a core question for the coach and the client as to which of the two approaches is likely to be the more generative? It is my position that anything the coach can do to encourage an excellence based approach to the coaching process, to their client’s process of moving toward their outcomes, and to living in general will ultimately produce results that are far more sustainable and welcome because striving for excellence is more generative than is striving for perfection.

As a matter of fact, coaching the client in moving from an approach that tends to perfection can be (and usually is) a wonderful coaching opportunity in and of itself. Being able to draw the client’s attention to the differences between the two approaches opens the door to far richer conversations and far more sustainable results than may otherwise be possible.

(c)2010 by Blaine Bartlett

All Rights Reserved

Note: This article is abstracted from the Introduction of the book Three Dimensional Coaching by Blaine Bartlett. The book is due to be published late in 2010.