1. Sticks and stones won’t break my bones” – and words won’t leave any measurable physical damage, but they will cause progressive, long-term harm. Never underestimate the power of words: words are used to brainwash.

Being told you are “stupid”, “ugly”, “lazy” or “worthless” is never acceptable. The first times you hear it, it will hurt, naturally. In time you “may get used to” hearing it from a partner. That’s when you start to internalise and believe it. When that happens you are doing the other person’s work of putting you down for them. This is why your feelings of self-worth suffer increasingly over time.

The good news is that just as words have been used to bring you down, you can learn to harness the power of words to build you up and restore your confidence and belief in yourself.

2. You are always told that it’s your fault. Somehow, whatever happens, however it starts, the ultimate blame is always yours. Notice that we are talking ultimate blame here. The blaming partner will always tell you that their behaviour was caused by what you said or did. In fact, their argument runs along the lines that you can’t possibly blame them for anything, because if you hadn’t said what you said, or done what you did it would never have happened.

3. You’re more inclined to believe your partner than you are to believe yourself. Have you ever reeled with a sense of hurt and injustice, or seethed with anger at the way you’ve been treated? Have you found yourself asking: “Is it reasonable to feel like this?” “Am I misinterpreting things?” “Have I got it wrong?”

If this is you, what it means is that you have become so brainwashed you’ve stopped trusting in your own judgement. Your mind keeps throwing up the observations and questions because, deep down, you know that what is happening is utterly wrong. But right now you can’t feel the strength of your own convictions.

4. You need your partner to acknowledge your feelings. Have you ever felt desperate to make your partner hear what you are saying and apologise for the hurtful things they’ve said? Have you ever felt that only they can heal the pain they’ve caused?

Does your need for them to validate your feelings keep you hooked into the relationship?

When a partner constantly denies or refuses to listen to your feelings, that is, unquestionably, mental abuse.

5. Your partner blows hot and cold. He can be very loving but is often highly critical of you. He may tell you how much he loves you, yet he is short on care or consideration towards you. In fact, some of the time, maybe even a lot of the time, he treats you as if you were someone he truly dislikes.

You do everything you can to make him happy, but it’s never good enough. You’re more like the pet dog in the relationship than you are the equal partner. Your constant efforts to get his attention and please him meet with limited success. Sometimes he’ll be charmed, often he’s dismissive.

If you find yourself puzzling about how your partner can treat you that way, it is because you are trying to live in a love-based relationship, when in reality you are living in a control-based relationship. The mental abuser struggles with his own feelings of worthlessness and uses his relationship to create a feeling of personal power, at his partner’s expense.

6. You feel as if you are constantly walking on eggshells. There is a real degree of fear in the relationship. You have come to dread his outbursts, the hurtful things that he will find to say to you. (Maybe the same anxiety and need to please spill over into your other relationships also.)

Fear is not part of a loving relationship, but it is a vital part of a mentally abusive relationship. It enables the abuser to maintain control over you.

7. You can heal. Mentally abusive relationships cause enormous emotional damage to the loving partner who tries, against all odds, to hold the relationship together and, ultimately, can’t do it, because her partner is working against her.

Whether you are currently in a mentally abusive relationship, have left one recently, or years later are still struggling with the anxieties and low self-worth and lack of confidence caused by mental abuse, it is never too late to heal.

But you do need to work with a person or a programme specifically geared to mental abuse recovery.

Women who have suffered mental abuse expect radical change of themselves, and they expect it right away. This is why they often struggle and, not uncommonly, take up with another abusive partner.

Mental abuse recovery is a gradual process. Low self-worth and limiting beliefs about what kind of future the abuse sufferer can ever hope for are the blocks that can stop women from moving on. But they are blocks that you can clear very effectively. Just as language was once used to harm you, you can now learn how language can heal you. You can overcome past mental abuse and keep yourself safe from it in the future. You can also learn to feel strong, believe in yourself and create the life and the relationships you truly want.

“The Woman You Want To Be” is a unique workbook designed to accompany you on a year long journey into emotional health and happiness.

(C) 2005 Annie Kaszina

Hey, very important question for ya…you enjoy sex right? And for the most part, one of the most enjoyable elements of having sex is looking at the gorgeous woman that you’re on top of and saying “YES! She is hot!”

Am I wrong here but when it comes to overcoming premature ejaculation, why do people consistently tell you to ‘think about other things while you are having sex’?

Doesn’t that take away from the gratification of having sex in the first place?

There is a huge problem with this if the only way a guy can last longer in bed, is to look away and think about his taxes. But I’ll tell you why this is such ignorant advice…

Most of the advice like “Just use your imagination to think about something else every 5 minutes” is total crap because it’s coming from people who have no idea what it’s like to suffer from premature ejaculation.

And if we are on the same page here, and you know how frustrating it can be, then you know exactly how demeaning such advice can be.

But what if there was in fact a way to enjoy every single second and minute of sex, and actually think about it the whole entire time, and last for as long as you want?

Well there is! And all it involves is a series of exercises that are designed to strengthen your PC muscle so you re able to preform and last longer like never before. These exercises have been proven over and over again, and guys from all over the world are using them to last longer in bed and finally be able to THINK about sex while they are having it.

Can you tell the day for any date without a calendar at hand? Is that really possible?

It is actually a simple skill that any one can learn. It is also very practical as you may always consider your availability for an activity or an event or you just need to know the day of anyone’s birthday. All you need is a little bit of practice, then you can quickly and easily tell the day of the week of practically any date in history or in the future.

Here’s the Secret

You may need to memorize some codes to learn this trick, but they are very easy to remember.

First, we assign a code number to every day of the week.

Monday – 1

Tuesday – 2

Wednesday – 3

Thursday – 4

Friday – 5

Saturday – 6

Sunday – 7 or 0

Second, we assign a code number for every month of the year. These month codes are used for every year with two exceptions. In a leap year, the month code for January is 5 and for February is 1. The month codes with the corresponding mnemonics are as follows:

January – 6 (WINTER has 6 letters)

February – 2 (2nd month)

March – 2 (You march with 2 feet)

April – 5 (APRIL has 5 letters)

May – 0 (MAY0 for mayonnaise)

June – 3 (JUN has 3 letters)

July – 5 (JULIE has 5 letters)

August – 1 (August begins with an A, the 1st letter)

September – 4 (SEPT has 4 letters)

October – 6 (Halloween TRICKS or TREATS have 6 letters each)

November – 2 (2nd last month)

December – 4 (XMAS has 4 letters)

Third, we assign a code number for every year. For example, the year code for 2011 is 6.

The Formula

Day of the week = (Month code + Date + Year Code) mod 7

Note: mod 7 indicates the remainder you get when you divide by 7.

Examples

What is the day for July 16, 2011?

Day of the week = (Month code + Date + Year Code) mod 7

Day of the week = (5 + 16 + 6) mod 7 = 27 mod 7 = 6 (Therefore, it’s a Saturday)

What is the day for December 25, 2011?

Day of the week = (Month code + Date + Year Code) mod 7

Day of the week = (4 + 25 + 6) mod 7 = 35 mod 7 = 0 (Therefore, it’s a Sunday)

Hooray! With constant practice, you are now ready to be the walking calendar. Amaze your friends, colleagues, students, teachers and everyone else.

The first step to improving one’s overall health is to recognize that we are made up of four bodies: the physical or etheric, emotional, mental, and spiritual bodies. Each one is integrated with the other three and unless all four work together optimally the individual will feel unhealthy, poorly, imbalanced, or sick.

What does one have to do to become aware of these four bodies? The education begins with an introduction to pranic healing, raja yoga, breathing techniques, and massage therapy techniques.

The emotional body is regulated by the limbic region of the brain. The mental body is regulated by the cerebral cortex which, through nerve synapses connects and organizes the various parts of the operating brain to perform the myriad tasks assigned to it every second of every moment. The mental body is connected to the physical body through a network of nerves and muscles which actualize the brain’s commands. The mental body also controls the circulatory, respiratory, crystallizing, metabolizing, catabolizing, assimilating, absorption, excretion, and endocrine systems.

Master Choa Kok Sui who formulated and developed the modern theories and techniques of pranic healing makes the remark that “When the energy body is functioning properly, then the physical body will be healthy”. This is a paraphrase intended to communicate that by manipulating the functioning of the chakras the pranic healer is able to scan, cleanse, and energize each and every chakra which needs it. These chakras or energy distribution centers are connected to the physical tissues, organs, muscles and nervous system via the yin and yang meridians, connected through contact of the tongue to the upper palette. The energy body is held together by our aura which surrounds and connects to the chakras. My source is ” Advanced Pranic Healing” by Grand Master Choa Kok Sui.

There are many colored auras depending on each one’s individual personality based on genetics and past lives. The colours of these auras are analyzed within the four quadrants of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual dominating attributes. A great source for this information is from Barbara Bowers book entitled “What colour is your aura?”.

The use of yoga for wellbeing is elaborate and multi-levelled. Yoga means “union with God”. There are many forms of yogic expression but the main ones concern the application of poses or ‘asanas’ which strengthen and stretch the various body parts with the goal of rendering the body stronger, more flexible, integrating the emotional, mental and spiritual dimensions of the being by using mindfulness of the breathing to center the activities down from the mind into the body and chakra centers. This is the active form of Yoga. There is also the meditative part of yoga which is done by sitting motionless, incorporates the breathing mindfulness with the quietening of the mind, an emptying of the mind of all thoughts allowing the mind to rest and become stronger and more focused. Source is:” The Art and Science of Raja Yoga” by Swami Kriyananda (J. Donald Walters).

It is through the practice of mindfulness of the breathing that one is able to ‘be’ in the present moment, of each inhalation, bringing fresh prana into the body, and with the exhalation releasing the body’s toxins and depleted prana through the breath. A great reference is “Breathe! You are alive” by Thich Nhat Hahn.

The Buddhist practice of the principles of inter-being, impermanence, and emptiness allows the ‘being’ to implement the values of shoulds and should nots raising oneself above the suffering of dualism up to the freedom of nirvana or nirbikhalpa, peaceful bliss. It is by learning that you and I are ‘one’, that our happiness can only come when the other’s suffering stops, that our prosperity depends on achieving abundance for all; that there is no birth or death, only transformation and transition from one state of being into another, from the seen to the unseen. The emptiness is achieved by seeing without eyes, hearing without ears, tasting without a tongue, touching without contact, and thinking without concepts, feeling without emotion. My source for this information is “Understand our mind” by Thich Nhat Hanh.

Massage therapy is the method which I use to assist the integration of the four bodies by manipulating tissues, muscles, and moving the energy to remove congestions and depletions and energize and optimize chakras which are overactive or inhibited. I use a variety of massage therapy techniques which release contractures and adhesions and when these do not work the pranic healing techniques using colour prana are most effective to achieve release of tension. The pranic healing is also able to regenerate tissues, cartilage, bones, stop fresh wounds from bleeding, dissolve kidney and gallstones, tumors, regulate high blood pressure, and improve overall wellbeing.

The game of baseball cannot begin without the action of one position.

In basketball there is a lot of focus on the point guard. In football there is a lot of focus on the quarterback.

These are important positions, but there is no position that is more important than a pitcher in baseball.

There is so much responsibility that involves a pitcher. From throwing different pitches, knowing the various hitters, fielding their position, pickoff moves, to controlling the running game, to dealing with adversity, mental focus, and dealing with fatigue, a pitcher has a lot to deal with.

If one of these important parts of pitching is missing, you do not have a complete pitcher. Missing one of these components negatively affects all of the other components.

Most pitchers are not advanced to be good in all of these areas, however, when you realize what areas a pitcher is weak in you can begin to attack it and improve.

The mental game in pitching is so important, oftentimes more important than the physical part.

Andy Pettitte, great guy who I hung out with in the Dominican

You must teach your pitchers to think one pitch at a time. It is very easy to think about the past or future, and this inhibits your ability to be best the possible in the present.

Cues such as get to the top of the baseball, or take a deep breath and focus on executing the pitch, create movement at release are great for creating the right type of focus.

Attempting to throw harder in times of struggle or getting mad at infielders or the umpire are typical things that make a pitchers struggle even worse.

Teach your pitchers how to coach themselves and watch them develop right under your eyes.

P.S. One pitch at a time, one pitch at a time. Oftentimes a mound visit is very effective in calming a pitcher down. Tell him to step off the mound and focus on dominating the things he can control. What can he control?

1. His focus

2. Executing each pitch

3. Attacking the strike zone

4. Taking deep breaths

5. His body language

Things he can’t control?

1. Where the ball is hit

2. What the umpire calls

3. If his fielders catch the ball

4. The mound conditions

5. Bad luck

Get your pitchers to focus on the controllables and they will deal with failure and adverse conditions much better.

Coach it up,

Miles

Martial arts, is one of the best physical and mental activities that it also can help the mind grow and develop. Martial arts, is physical but it is also mental the martial arts can benefit the whole person it can help with flood development. It is not just a bunch of kicks, punches and throws. The mental art can plays a very large part on assisting a person to become better people. When I say better I am saying that martial arts is 10% physical and 90% mental. Please remember the mind guides the body. Martial arts like Karate, Jujutsu are outstanding not only for health but for self-defense, self-confidence, self-control, balance, stress reduction, social skills, and conditioning. This again is not just in the body it is very much in the mind.

Even if you are not yet ready to start your martial arts training but have a real desire to learn martial arts. You have to believe that you are ready in your mind first. You have to have a keep a positive outlook and create positive ways of seeing yourself in everything. Martial arts schools like the San Yama Bushi and Combination GoJu school of Self Defense (SYBCG) can help you. IMAGINATION – A mind once stretched by a new idea. Never regains its original dimensions. We are like fine wine. We can get better with age under the correct conditions. You control the conditions. In the martial arts, one of the first things that you have to do is find the right school and the right person to train with to assist you in your goal. Look for school and instructors with a positive feel and way of thing. I by no means, mean find a candy land school or instructor. I am also not saying find a school that has a kill or be killed mind-set. My goal here is to point you at a school that meets your needs and is real. Most of us are not actively in combat situations nor do we live in a prefect harmless world. Find a school with a good sound balance. Martial arts school can give you a great work-out, it should also be a place where you feel comfortable. The school and training should help you in many ways on your way to the goals. Once you start working out on any physical program at any level you should take it slow. Here is an area that we all should make sure we paid attention to that is stretching not just on the physical level but also on the mental level. We all have a lot to learn. Those that stop learning stop growing. Many people young and old do not open their mind to enough positive things. We need to surround ourselves with positives on all levels, that is people, places and things. It would also be to our benefit to us all to understand that being right is not always important. We could benefit from learning to let it go. As we get older, we lose flexibility in more areas then just our physical bodies. This lost of flexibility is on a mental level.

This again does not have to happen, however we see ever day in traffic, online, at home and in our schools etc. Just look at the morning news in the morning can be seen across the world. I have an instructor who is over 73 years of age he is in better physical condition then many 25 years old that I know. His name is Grand Master Reno Morales, he prefers Reno he is very active, so active that at his present age he is still ACTIVE as a bodyguard and his is an ACTIVE bounty hurter. I am not kidding. His have over 60 years in the martial arts. Please understand he trains everyday, eats correctly, has a positive mind attitude and has a fantastic memory. Please understand I am not saying that the martial arts, is the key to the fountain of youth, or that everyone that training has a positive mental attitude but I am saying that it has helped many. You mind and body, are very complicated machines if you do not take care of them they may not be able to take care of you. Keep them well tuned and in great shape. We at the SYBCG school of Self Defense work to assist all our students in always. We offer training is karate, jujutsu, cardio kickboxing, rape aggression defense, resisting aggression defensively, positive self-defense, DT and more. We also do want to help you to be the best person you can be as a whole person. Our school, systems and instructor are well rounded. Our training is in martial arts, martial arts sciences, natural health, reiki, mediation, personal fitness, trigger-point therapy, CPR, first aid, positive self-defense, etc. Please remember you can be better and improve your overall wellness. Martial arts can be a great path to better and longer good overall health and abilities. Keep this in mind. The thing is not what happens. It is in the interpretation of what we believe has happened means.

Life and time are precious lets use it and enjoy it for as long as we can. You are where you are by your habits. Change your habits change your life. Now let us change it for the better. Most of these changes are small but there effect can be huge. My oldest son is 24 my youngest is 9 years old, they are both in great physical health. I can present at 45 plus years of age out run them both. I can also keep up with all of my 4 children along with nieces and nephews in most activities. This to me is priceless.

I believe any educated and sensitive massage therapist will tell you that they tend to meet people who are more authentic in expressing themselves than perhaps one would just meet in an office setting. Even the same person is more authentic and gentle in a safe touch massage setting. Minimal clothing, lulling fountain sounds, the scent of lavendar, orange, sandalwood or other essential oils and music that doesn’t destroy your soul just seems to do that. Everyone needs safe touch to be comforted and to feel free to be themselves without judgement.

From my own experience, we live in a touch deprived culture. Touch someone in the workplace, even as an encouraging “good for you” pat on the back, and you might find yourself judged some kind of office pervert. Rub a back in gesture of comforting or hold a hand to say “I care about how you’re feeling,” and well, off to prison you go!! Touch in our culture is suspect and often threatening. I’m not encouraging anyone to just accept the touch of anyone they meet as well intentioned or harmless. But for the most part, out went the baby with the bathwater as usual.

I used to lay hands on people as a pastor in compliance with and hope that James 5:14-16 would bring about the desired and promised results. “Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. 16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”

I did this thousands of times and respectfully observe that it is not the cure for anything significant, from my perspective. I am sure however, that at times and because of the reaction of some, the touch itself was deeply appreciated and meaningful. A church or pastor that relies ONLY on this because “it’s in the Bible, God said it, I believe it, that does it for me,” is a fool and delaying help a genuinely sick person might need to receive from professionals. I’ve seen that in my past career and it’s difficult to speak of, though I was not of the anoint only perspective.

Kind, intentioned and educated touch seems to release a person from the masks we all wear. Everyone wears masks. It’s how we survive dealing with topics that we can not speak of or will receive no understanding for even thinking about. In massage, people become more openly genuine and some want to talk, at times, about what they really are thinking. Some few might wish to vent about the office envirnoment, the company or the boss, but when sharing, most simply talk about touch and why humans are so fearful of their own thoughts and needs.

“Needs”, now there is a word for you. Our Christian culture has all but beat the idea that what one needs having any validity out of the needy. Sermon after sermon over decades has made that equal with being selfish and carnal or unconverted and “of the world.” Just say “I need” to a pastor and often his own repressions will bubble up and you will receive a lecture on how the Bible tells us this or that mainly along the lines of “doing nothing through faction or through vainglory, but in lowliness of mind each counting other better than himself;” Phil. 2:3 (ASV) I always wondered if we are to count all others better than ourselves and all that implies about our own selfworth, what are others supposed to do?

Everyone needs to be safely touched. One client, long ago, was very quiet as I worked on them and then suddenly said, “don’t you think it’s funny my dad never hugged me?” We chatted a bit about that but I knew that me, a stranger, touching him set off that thought in contrast to his dad, who knew him well, never hugging him. After a few minutes he said, “I don’t think I am gay.” That was also a no brainer. Here is how it worked in his mind. “I like this touch.” “Dad never hugged me.” “Yikes, I like this and this is a guy!” “I better tell him I don’t think I’m gay so he doesn’t think I am.” Interesting huh? To him, touch was needed yet had connotations that weren’t really there, but needed to be referenced. I’m not gay by the way either.

One of the things people need to practice more is the phrase “I need.” It is not selfish or crass. It is human and is the stuff that makes relationships function at a more real and authentic level. How many relationships would be better or even saved if we learned to say, “I need you not to speak to me that way.” “I need you to be around more often.” “I need you to touch me in a way that feels caring of ME.” “I need you to listen to what I think for a change.” “I need you to give me some space.” “I need variety in my life.” “I need you to take better care of yourself.” “I need you to leave the people you don’t like, the crazy relatives, the stupid boss and the damn church out of our conversations.” “I need…” Try it sometime and you might see that others also need the same. They just didn’t know you knew anything about needs.

Others talk about what they don’t need in the way of touch in their lives. They don’t need to be grabbed, or pushed. They don’t need to be slapped or pinched crudely. They don’t need to feel used and not loved. I guess this is another whole topic.

The mask that covers topics of sexuality is a biggie for ALL people. All massage is sensual even when therapeutic as touch just is that by nature. In a safe and compassionate envirnoment, many think about the place that sex has or does not have in their lives. Human sexuality and the need to express it and experience it never goes away. I always got a chuckle about how the Bible tells us that when Moses died at 110 (maybe yes, maybe no), and that ” that Moses was one hundred and ten years of age when he died–that his eye was not dim, nor his natural force abated; …” This is a coded way of saying he noticed everything and could still get excited. How they knew this, I am not sure. I guess he bragged about it. But it is an old way to affirm that the man was not dead and that he was really really alive right up until he was dead. Many people I meet feel dead because they have no touch or sexual expression in their lives.

While many fundamentally religious types will deny this aspect of human need as being merely selfish and carnal, it is very normal and very necessary for a healthy life. The most extreme sexual religious ignorance I have heard to date is of one who always prayed to God they would not experience, shall we say, the unabated force, and have to have sex with a partner just for the sake of sex. Argh… no further comment. I’d say the partner is looking elsewhere in some way.

On the other hand, those that, while very religious and faithful to their church politely listen to those in authority represent “God’s view” on these topics to them every week, are very able to say that they don’t care what the minister says and their sexuality is really none of the church’s business, which it isn’t. I find so many devote believers who sturggle against what they are taught or in many cases not taught by a church. Much of that which has to do with human sexuality in the Bible is wrong and harmful to humans. It’s archaic, middle Eastern in perspective and It does control them nicely though which is perhaps it’s intent. It also promotes much anxiety and depression which are functions of an shame, guilt, fear and anger unexpressed. I have yet to meet an anxious or depressed client that is not fearful or angry about something they feel they have no right to or is too risky to express. Think about it.

I love my gay clients. There are probably no more honest, open and compassionate types of human being. They have a nature that lends itself to that and often the experience to reinforce the benefit of that way of being and thinking. They have also dealt with a lot of rejection and had to face issues of authenticity that, again, most never face, openly. Not one I know is gay by choice but rather by nature. Not one is trying to be ungay, nor should they. Everyone is a genuine human being who knows more about themselves than most will ever dare explore. I think of the one who was “outed” by a friend at Church and was given a video tape to watch on how to not be gay. If they could not change and the video did not convince them, then they were not welcome at church. Needless to say the video just didn’t work. I asked a lesbian client once why she came to me as I was, well…a man! I knew the history of abuse and was just wondering. She said the nicest thing I have ever had said to me. “Because I love what you do, I feel safe, and you are the only man that is ever going to touch me again.” Wow..but she wouldn’t let me use that in my advertising.

Everyone needs safe touch. Touch tends to send it’s message subtley but loud and clear. A client knows if I am not present in the massage by the way touch feels. One client said he’d tell me later in the session if he wanted to go for 90 minutes instead of just an hour. From my perspective, I’d like to know now as it determines what and how I do the massage, but I just said ok. I put my hands on him and made half a pass down the back when he said, “let’s do 90.” He said when I touched him, he knew he wanted to go longer. Nice compliment. It was the touch.

On occasions there might be a person who is so stressed and so angry, that they just feel that way without saying so. It is more sensing than feeling. I can feel a bad intention and it makes for a very long hour. Sometimes you just can’t put your “finger” on it but you know that all is not well. That’s how touch works too. Just the energy people give out can inform you long before they ever get near enough to touch you. It’s why we can feel great or bad when some people walk in the room. Even without touching us, they are getting to us.

So think about how you touch and why. The mantra for many is sadly “don’t touch me,” and that also needs to be respected. I believe much obesity is a subconscious message to “stay away form me.” Research tells us that 80% of all obese females have experienced sexual abuse. Sounds high to me, but might be close. Even untouch or ungentled, as the term is used, RATS, die sooner and don’t survive surgeries as well as those who are oft gentled or touched. How much more so our partners, family members, children and even ourselves. Watch even how others soothe and touch themselves to see that even unconsciously our brain tells our hands to comfort us in time of need.

So…have you gentled someone today? Or if you need it, do you allow. from those whose intentions are right, without drama or indictment. I always tell my clients, “more touch and less rocket propelled grenades is what I always say.” They laugh, and they always say, “ain’t that the truth.” Yes it is.

Ever thought of writing? Or tried writing?

If you have tried writing, we are sure you must have felt some kind of change.

Those who haven’t tried it before should give it a go as it is really beneficial for your mind’s health.

When you write down your thoughts, you feel revitalized; you feel so relaxed. People who always feel alone or those who isolate themselves from the rest of the world find solace when they write about their feelings and emotions.

You have no clue of how positively writing impacts your brain. Many of you are not aware of its benefits. We have pretty convincing reasons and for sure after reading those reasons, you will see the broader perspective of writing. You will get a transparent picture of how amazingly it influences your brain.

1. Your memory gets better

Have you ever made a to-do list?

Or do you know someone who has made a to-do list before?

If yes, then ask that person about its benefits. Though they prepare a to-do list, but they don’t have to see it again and again. Because when they write down all the tasks, it gets registered into their brains. Even when they forget anything, to recall that thing they just have to look at the to-do list they have prepared.

There are multiple benefits of having a to-do list. There is a temporal lobe in your brain, as soon as you write down something, it gets activated. The cells of that temporal lobe fire up and let you remember the thing you are writing down.

Your brain put more focus on the thing you write down rather than putting focus on what you jot down in your memory book.

Your to-do list helps you in getting better at organizing different tasks. You feel that you are more in control and all of your worries related to tasks will fly away.

2. Your visualization gets better

It is common for a human brain to associate everything with a picture. Even the letters we write, our brain associates it with different shapes. Getting better at visualization helps you a lot in the long run.

When you write down something, you strengthen up your visual log. Your brain processes the information faster when your brain’s visual log is activated. Your act of reading and writing helps you in creating a fine visual log for your brain.

3. Journaling improves your overall health

Many times we think of things, we face the adrenaline rush, but we fail to describe it. The emotions of anger disturb us like anything. We fail to understand how to let go of all the toxic thoughts that make it room in our brain.

The best way to let go of all the toxicity is that you start journaling. This habit will give you so much relief. Your emotions will be under your control. Soon, you’ll experience that you are getting emotionally stable.

Journaling is a way of healing yourself; it illuminates your path at every stage of life. You face certain events in life and the toxicity associated with that event get absorbed in your mind. Journaling helps you in processing the stressful and traumatic thoughts faster. You can reap more benefits of journaling. One of the most amazing benefits is that your immune system gets stronger.

A study was conducted at the University of Texas and the results turned out to be that jotting down your thoughts in a journal strengthen your T-lymphocytes.

T-lymphocytes is the biological term for those cells that help you in fighting different infections.

Journaling activates the left side of a human’s brain which is related to memory. Now, some of you must be thinking that what about the right side of the brain that is associated with fantasy & creativity? Does it neglect it?

No the right side of the brain is not neglected here. It must be a surprise to you, but it is true that when your left brain is working, automatically your right brain wakes up from sleep and help you in fantasizing and give a boost to your creativity.

4. Writing makes you smarter

We know you are already smart, but the add-on is not bad. Don’t you agree?

Writing transforms you from smart to smarter. Writing gives clarity on everything. Verbal communication is good, but it doesn’t provide you that clarity on any subject the way writing does.

Before heading onto writing about a specific topic, you need to have your grip on that topic. Your knowledge of that topic comes first when you decide on writing about a particular subject. Before writing about a particular subject, you first have to organize all the thoughts related to that subject then you have to research on that topic. Two things are happening here, you are getting more information related to that topic and you include your thoughts about the process as well.

Writing enhances your vocabulary log which becomes a part of your verbal communication as well. When we read a particular thing or when we write about a particular thing, we think of phrases and words to mention a thing in fewer words. For this, we make our way towards “Mr. Google” and find out the phrases and words that can describe the lengthy paragraph merely in a few lines.

As a person, you feel good when you add so many new words and phrases to your vocabulary log.

When we start using new words and phrases to our vocabulary log, we get the motivation to find more.

5. Go back to the Stone Age

Oh please! Don’t take it too literally. Going back to the Stone Age doesn’t stand for taking a nail and start engraving words on a stone. You have to go back to the time when there was no pen tablet, there was no gadget and you solely used to depend on the pen and paper.

Wave goodbye to your electronic gadgets, take a pen and paper and start jotting down your thoughts. Before that we want to ask you something, how many sketchbooks and pens do you own? If your answer is “Many” then we can say that you are addicted to stationery (which is apparently a good thing), but if you say that you don’t own any stationery then we may say that you have imprisoned your entire being in the desert of gadgets.

When you grab a pen and start writing, your brain engages in this activity. Your brain starts working in 3 ways here. First of all, you hold a pen (here you are using your motor skills) then you try to recall the lines you want to write (makes your memory stronger) and then you start associating the word with different images that get formed into the core of your mind (strengthen your visual log).

6. Writing helps you in becoming better at writing

We all know that when we read, our brain functions better and help us in the writing process. Little we are aware of the fact that writing your thoughts and feelings help you a lot in strengthening your ability to write.

Can you think of the ideas that came across to your mind when you were working on certain things? You forgot to write down those ideas and now it is way too complicated to recall them again. The best thing to do in this case is to jot down the bullet points as soon as the idea strikes to your mind. Let the creativity flow, but don’t forget to write down all the amazing things because they are hard to come by.

7. It helps you in finding solutions

You feel agitated when you fail to find a solution to a specific problem. This thing gets its roots developed and you feel angry at almost everything. It may sound a bit weird because you haven’t tried it before, but it is true that writing can solve plenty of problems.

When there is a problem, you look for the details and then you try to come up with the possible solution for it. Nothing can help you more than writing. Just jot down all of your problems related to that subject and then try to look for the details. Take notes of the possible things that come to your mind. When you have a fine data, solving that problem won’t be a big task for you.

This way your problem-solving skills get better and the agitation will fly away.

The bottom line

Your mental health is of utmost importance and compromising on it is the worst thing ever. Writing may look like another task for you, but trust us it solves your problem on a greater scale. You might also try any of the available writing curriculum on the web!

You can’t reap its benefits unless you start doing it. No matter what you write, just write it down. Let the creativity flow, let the toxic thoughts go out of your body, jot down ideas and revitalize once again. You too can reap the benefits that we mentioned. Now the ball is in your court. Avail the opportunity and make yourself free from all the worries.

YOUR EMOTIONS

In English we use exactly the same word to denote a sensory physical touch or sensation as for ‘feeling’ meaning emotional mood and experience. Although it is often the case that sensory feeling is accompanied by an emotional state, it is important that we clarify that the following use of the word applies to our emotions. Emotions can directly affect out mental health.

The basic emotions of a human being we know as feelings of contentment, happiness or joy, suffering or pain, sympathy, kindness, anger, envy, jealousy, compassion, irritation, fear, faith, anxiety, hatred, love, yearning, desire, and so on. In each person these ingredients are developed and exercised differently to make up a different and unique recipe of emotions that define his individuality and which separate him from other people around him. Many of the basic ingredients may be common but how these ingredients are blended is up to the choice of each individual. These familiar feelings or emotions may be blended into a character seeking harmony in a stable and positively polarized personality or can be thrown together in a recipe which results in a chaotic and violent emotional disposition.

Untrained emotions are usually a hotch potch of emotional and often unconscious responses to one’s life experiences without having been sorted or cleansed to eliminate the negatives, which regrettably, often predominate. This state continues until the person grows discomforted in being always in anger, depression, fear or other unpleasant emotional states and uses his will to alter his mood. To alter one’s emotional pattern requires time and patience do all efforts involved in self culture. Success depends upon our own clear goal and also a degree of friendly encouragement from others.

Our emotions require nourishment through idealism, affection, companionship, devotion, appreciation by others, loving kindness and understanding – all of which will encourage growth of the finest emotions. These feelings, if neglected will allow any negative emotions to grow like weeds. Worse, if you would consciously choose to have interest in matters of violence, ugliness, horror and depravity, the emotional nature will in turn seek to express these degraded actions and emotions. It is a matter of choice.

It may be easier to say “I was born that way” than to undertake a change in habitual emotional reactions or to affirm that it is laziness which allows negative emotions to take hold and become an obstruction to intellectual achievement and peace of mind.

The rewards for undertaking self-responsibility however are great will endure for your lifetime as you enjoy greater greater mental fitness.

Sailing is not only beneficial for the body but for the mind and soul as well. You can achieve an excellent fitness regimen while having a tremendous time under the sun. Here are to mention some of the health advantages of sailing.

1. Physical fitness – The constant task of pulling and hoisting a sail to keep the boat in the right track strengthens and builds muscles of the upper and lower extremities, trunk and abdomen. Agility, flexibility and endurance of the body needed to meet the demands of sailing activities are developed and enhanced.

2. Cardiovascular fitness – Just like all physical activities and sports that keep one healthy, sailing activities can decrease the risk of heart disease and hypertension, lower cholesterol levels, and reduce risk for obesity. And just like all muscles, the heart grows stronger with exercise, so it can pump blood more effectively throughout the arteries and veins of the body and also work at maximum rate with less effort. Those who exercise also have a slower resting heart rate due to less effort needed to pump blood.

3. Psychological – Why are people always in a jolly and pleasant mood while out on the water? Aside from the natural calming effects generated by the sounds of the waves and the wind, the saltiness in the air also contributes to that feeling of euphoria. The various moods of an individual are greatly affected by a neurotransmitter called serotonin, a chemical substance that is known to produce a happy feeling. The saltiness of air is comprised of charged ions which promote oxygen absorption in the body, thereby producing a more balanced serotonin levels. The more balanced the serotonin levels in the body are, the greater the sense of happiness.

4. Relaxation – The sound of the wind and waves, splashing water, the cadenced movement of the boat, and the feel of breeze on your face stimulate the brain wave patterns in ways that promote a relaxing and calming effect to a person. The body and mind are alleviated from stresses and anxiety as one becomes relaxed and focuses on the fun and exciting tasks.

5. Concentration – Concentration skill is developed and enhanced while sailing as sailors need to stay focused and mentally alert to perform the multiple challenging tasks at hand.

In addition to the above health benefits, sailing provides an opportunity for people to socialize and spend time outside with a positive ambiance. Sailors belong to an active, diverse and dynamic enthusiast group. Furthermore, sailing creates a sense of healthy and strong appreciation for nature.