Hillary Clinton’s interview on the Tyra Banks Show has resurrected the question of why many women choose to stay with cheating husbands rather than filing for divorce.
It’s hard for many women to understand why a woman like Hillary Clinton would stay married to a husband like Bill Clinton who reportedly has a history of extramarital affairs, and is rumored to have cheated on her on more than one occasion ( Monica Lewinsky, Gennifer Flowers, and Paula Jones)
Reasons Women Stay with Cheating Men
Below are just a few of the many reasons wives choose to stay with husbands who cheat:
- Love
- Convenience
- Financial reasons
- Not willing to give up lifestyle
- Insufficient proof of infidelity
- For the sake of the children
- Fear of change
- Low self esteem
- Bad timing
- Thinking the cheater will change
- To achieve career goals
- Hoping counseling will help
- Fear of being alone
- Loyalty
- Religious beliefs
- Desire to keep the family intact
- Belief that it won’t happen again
But there are many other reasons, as well — reasons which make sense only to the woman involved.
In the end, it comes down to a woman doing what she feels is in her (and her children’s) best interests.
In her interview with Tyra Banks, Hillary Clinton stated “I really had to dig down deep and think hard about what was right for me, what was right for my family.”
A Woman Shouldn’t Have to Explain
Having been a victim of infidelity myself, I feel that no woman – not even Hillary Clinton — should have to explain or defend her decision to anyone (other than her children) why she has chosen to leave or to stay with a husband who cheats.
Choosing to leave, or to stay with a cheating spouse is a personal matter. Some women may make a spur the moment decision when they find out about the affair. And many times they may regret their choice. For other women, whether to stay or leave is a well-thought-out decision in which many factors have been taken into consideration.
So, while we can speculate, no one can presume to know the real reasons Hillary chose to stay with Bill, except Hillary Clinton, herself.
What NOT to Do When a Husband Cheats
Friends, family members – even total strangers – who know about the affair like to weigh in on what a woman should do when she finds out about her husband’s affair.
After 15 years of researching male and female infidelity, and consulting regularly with victims of infidelity, I’ve found that it’s more important to know what NOT to do after the discovery of an extramarital affair..
Many women react blindly when they find out about their husband or boyfriend is having an affair. They let fear, anger, hurt, or a desire for revenge cause them to do things they later regret.
Regardless of whether a woman ultimately decides to stay with the cheater or leave him, doing the wrong thing in the initial stages of discovery will only make a bad situation worse. It can even sabotage the course of action she later decides to take. Hillary Clinton was wise to avoid making a decision in the heat of the moment, and to take ample time to think through the situation and decide what was right for her.
For Hillary Clinton, the right decision was to stay. For me, the right decision was to leave. ( I’ve been happily married for 8 years now to a man whose first wife cheated on him) Each woman must decide for herself. The most important thing to do is avoid making a mistake that can undermine the final course of action you decide to take.
FREE Tips on How to Avoid Making a Mistake
If your spouse or significant other is having an affair, I have a special report entitled 5 Things You SHOULDN’T Do If He’s Cheating on You, which can help you avoid making a fatal mistake. It covers five things you should avoid doing immediately after discovering the extramarital affair, and examines the reasons why. For your FREE copy, email InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with 5 things-ez in the subject line.
