If you want to know how to get a girl to say yes, then this is the article you want to read. I will share with you some explosive covert MIND CONTROL that would make any woman surrender to you – and do whatever you ask her to do. These are amazingly powerful psychology and persuasion tactics that have been proven to work time and again. Read on to discover how you can use the same tactics used by politicians and cult leaders to attract followers and make them literally give up their LIVES for the cause…

How To Get A Girl To Say Yes – Make Her Surrender Using Super COVERT MIND CONTROL Tactics That Work!

“Use The Juicy Carrot And Fat Stick”. You would firstly need to “condition” a woman’s mind to obey you – by making her feel “painful” when she says no to you. You could achieve this using several methods. Whenever she misbehaves, punish her by giving her the cold shoulder, or even go out with other women. Remember that the key to making a woman obey you is to make her emotionally addicted to you. Read on to discover the tactic to make a woman feel that she is dependent on you emotionally…

“Give Her Emotional Trauma”. The fact is that women LOVE experiencing emotional drama. The fact is that if you could make a woman feel extreme sadness and happiness, then you would be able to make a girl say YES to you no matter what. Therefore, think of it as your RESPONSIBILITY to make a woman’s life exciting… by making her experience the trials and turbulence of life.

Sometimes women feel frustrated with the fact that their man has not yet said “I love you”. The fact is that men generally say “I love you” in different ways but still it is hearing him actually say the words that satisfy women. Here are ways to provoke your man into saying “I love you”.

Let him realize the fact
It could be that he is already in love with you but has not yet admitted the fact to himself! Let him realize that he loves you. Once he does that he will probably tell you. Wait for him to make up his mind about you and don’t rush him or you will lose him.

He will first give you nonverbal clues
Don’t impatiently wait for him to utter the words “I love you” the moment he begins dating you. Look for signs and clues that show you that he is in love with you first. Be happy to see him relaxed and enjoying himself in your company. The verbal expression will come.

Give him clues too
Once you realize that he is beginning to like you by watching his body language, his smiles and gestures etc that confirm his interest, you should give him clues too. Show him that you like him and indicate that the sentiments he has for you are mutual.

Spend quality time together
Give him your attention and show him that you have similar interests. Do little things that prove your love for him and bide your time. When the time is right he will declare his love for you. Have confidence in yourself and enjoy his company wholeheartedly.

Let go of him a little
This means that you don’t have to cling to him and show him how desperate you are. The moment he feels you are being a “parasite” or someone who just won’t let go, he will begin to have second thoughts about you. There is a fine line that separates “desperation” and “expression of your feelings”.

Test him
You could test his feelings for you. Go away for a while and see if absence has made his heart fonder. Show him that you consider yourself pretty much “free” as there were no verbal confirmations of love. This could prompt him to say “I love you” in a shot!

Ask him how he feels
If you are bold enough you could ask him what he thought about you and where the whole relationship is heading. If things are serious between you, he will obviously reply to the question and may end up telling you that he loves you. If not, well you have your answer!

During chapter 2 of the online course from his book A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle with Oprah answered a caller’s inquiry about knowing when to let go and when to be assertive.

Michelle called in from Philadelphia, PA to participate in the discussion asking: “I’m a little bit confused with chapter 2. I understand the quote, ‘If someone takes your shirt, let them have your coat as well.’ Where do you draw the line without getting walked all over? I don’t want to be an egotistical person, but at the same time I do not want to get taken advantage of. So I’m having a little bit of confusion with that.”

The passage Michelle was referring to came directly from the Bible as originally spoken by Jesus. “To him that hits you on one cheek offer the other also; and to him that takes away your shirt, give him your coat also.” (Luke 6:29)

Jesus sought to build a spiritual kingdom and build the inner man within humanity, whereby they would not hold tightly to and be encumbered by earthly things. Jesus said, “For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:26)

The rich young ruler came to Jesus and said: “Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?” (Matthew 19:16) Jesus sensing the flattery a bit, immediately had him redirect his attention toward God the Father and keeping the commandments to enter into life.

The young man said to Jesus, “All these things have I kept from my youth up: what do I yet lack?” (v. 20) Interestingly, the young man did not simply say he had kept the commandments, but went so far as to point out he had done so throughout his youth until now. This might signal a slight bit of self-righteousness and tendency to trying to earn salvation by good works. Note the young man asked what he must “do” to have eternal life.

Christ and the kingdom of God however are received and entered into by faith, not good works. Of course thereafter you get to do good works, but by no means must you do good works. Good works are to flow freely from the heart as you love God and your neighbor.

Jesus discerned the young man’s dilemma and issue, after which Jesus without hesitation cut to the chase and advised him. “If you will be perfect, go and sell what you have, and give to the poor, and you shall have treasure in heaven: and come and follow Me” (Matthew 19:21).

He had great possessions, but more importantly his response revealed the condition of his heart. The reply of the young man says it all. “But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions.” (v. 22)

This showed that he was possessed by his possessions, or that his possessions owned him. Jesus beholding the young man walk away said, “How hard it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven” (v. 23).

Note Jesus did not say it was impossible, just more difficult and hard. Because when you have this world’s material goods in your possession, you become increasingly self-sufficient. The tendency therefore is to pull away from God and become a god unto yourself.

Yet Joseph of Arimathea was a rich disciple who wholeheartedly followed Jesus (Matthew 27:57), proving that it can successfully be done. Zacchaeus who was chief among the publicans was also rich. Zacchaeus so hungered for Christ that he climbed up into a sycamore tree to see Jesus when He passed by. Believing wholeheartedly in Christ the Lord, Zacchaeus immediately repented, made restitution, and experienced a glorious salvation in his house (see Luke 19:2-9).

Eckhart when answering Michelle’s question replied, “All it says is sometimes letting go, there’s more power in letting go than in clinging or hanging on to something. So there are situations when you actually become empowered when you let go, rather than when you cling. It does not mean that people walk all over you. In fact there are situations when you have to say no very clearly as to a situation or to a person, but even that ‘no’ can be of two different kinds.”

Tolle continued, “Usually the no is very negative. When you say ‘no’ to a person; a person says, ‘I’ll give you a ride home.’ But you see the person is drunk. Of course you wouldn’t say yes just to be pleasant. You say no.”

“Now do you say no with negative energy and in a state of resistance or do you say not that is positive? It simply means a clear and straight forward, ‘No, I won’t do that.'”

“This is very different from the resistant no. I call that the no that is not negative – a high quality no.”

Oprah added some insight: “It’s also looking at the reason, why you would cling to the shirt. …If the reason why you’re holding to the shirt causes you to think the shirt is going to give you more value or you’re operating from your ego when you’re holding on to it. So you’re saying …surrender whatever needs to be surrendered.”

Oprah is correct in seeking to assess the motivation of the heart and the “reason” for clinging on to things. This is precisely why Jesus told the rich young ruler to sell his possessions and give to the poor, because Jesus sensed the young man’s unhealthy attachment and identification with his possessions.

Truly the Word of God is likened unto a two-edged sword that cuts, divides, and discerns the thoughts and intentions of the heart (see Hebrews 4:12). Yet we know that it is very possible to be both rich and spiritual, because all of Jesus’ apostles were previously successful businessmen. Upon becoming Christ’s disciples and traveling with him, they continued to support themselves and their families.

Therefore when Jesus said, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God” (Mark 10:25). Jesus’ disciples immediately were astonished beyond measure. Why so? Because they knew their own economic standing and were concerned with their own spiritual well being.

The disciples fearing for their own salvation said among themselves, “Who then can be saved?” (Mark 10:26) Jesus answered them saying, “With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible” (Mark 10:27).

This comment and reply from Jesus is to say that men can buy nearly everything, but not eternal salvation. This alone therefore comes from God, which if you keep your heart tender and sensitive to the Spirit of the Lord you can have. The problem with things is that they have a tendency to encumber one’s heart and thereby like weeds “choke out the Word of God’ making it unfruitful in you.

“The cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke God’s Word, making it unfruitful in you” (see Mark 4:19).

Jesus being fully committed to earthly prosperity as well as heavenly riches and glory expounded saying, “There is no man that has left house, or brothers, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for My sake, and the gospel’s, but he shall receive an hundredfold now in this time, houses, and brothers, and sisters, and mothers, and children, and lands, with persecutions; and in the world to come eternal life” (Mark 10:29-30).

Interestingly, Jesus said along with the blessings that come when you seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness (Matthew 6:31), along with them you shall be persecuted. And the majority of persecution comes from the jealous religious crowd who want what you’ve got, but haven’t paid the price that you’ve sacrificially and experientially paid.

Many wanted (and still want and pursue) the revelation and divine insight of the apostle Paul. Yet very few are willing to endure the hardships, abuse, persecution, and difficulties that Paul endured to get such inward revelation.

In answer to Michelle’s question, no we should not let ourselves be doormats for people to use and abuse. When the Pharisees and scribes sought to entangle Jesus in His speech, He wisely answered them and withdrew Himself from among them. Moreover when appropriate, Christ boldly confronted them to address their own hypocrisy.

We cannot correct what we refuse to confront. Often what you tolerate will continue to dominate.

Therefore we must bring order to our lives, homes, and interactions professionally and socially; lest we be bulldozed over by cunning people in the business world and society.

God gave you heart and backbone, preserve and use them both when appropriate. As you do you shall guard and protect the positive life force energy flowing in and through you.

Communicating well is one of the most common errors of modern life and no doubt historically too. To speak and tell something to another person is critical to good relationships. To listen, hear and understand the message is a necessary part of good communication. Often what is heard was not the intention of the messenger. Thus, we have apples and oranges, instead of apples and apples.

Being able to communicate is probable one of the most important of all life skills We learn to communicate from our parents or primary caregivers and emulate the way they communicate.

Communication, at its simplest, is the act of transferring information from one person to another. It may be vocally (using voice), written (using printed or digital media such as books, magazines, websites or emails), visually (using logos, maps, charts or graphs) or non-verbally (using body language, gestures and the tone and pitch of voice). In practice, it is often a combination of several of these.

Communication is a two-way process, involving both sending and receiving a message. It is imperative that both the sender and receiver understand the content of the words in the message sent. If not confusion and misunderstanding prevail.

Basic verbal communication skills include paraphrasing, this remedy is to paraphrase for clarity. Simply say back to the person what you heard. “So, what I heard you say was_________.” The messenger will say either “Yes, that is what I said.” Or “No, I said_________.” And then will restate and clarify the message until they are both on the same page

It is crucial for the recipient of the message to listen actively and to respond appropriately, either by asking questions for clarity or more information or to offer support to the messenger.

A common error is to respond by taking the thought away and telling a similar personal experience which has the effect on the messenger of not being heard or being discounted.

Another is interrupting the messenger when triggered by something being said. Again discounting and disrupting effective communication. Being interrupted or receiving inappropriate responses has the effect on the messenger to be sabotaged and reluctant to communicate further with this person. In this case feedback to the other person may be appropriate.

Listening is a crucial component to effective communication. To be heard is important to the messenger who may be vulnerable in sharing ideas or personal information. Active listening may be shown by, gestures like eye contact, nodding of the head, smiling, etc.

Stay with the messenger and responding appropriately when they appear to finish. Asking for more information will most often be welcomed as an indication of being heard.

Feedback is one of the important communication skills. It may be risky to let the other person know the effect you experience, especially when you have been interrupted, but it may be a positive experience also.

Feedback always starts with an “I’ statement. “I feel frustrated when I tell you something personal and you take the subject away and interject an experience of yours.”

The important elements are “I feel” and ‘when you”.This way of communicating avoids blame or accusing the other of wrongdoing, thus feeling defensive, but it encourages being receptive to hearing the error which is often an unconscious way of communicating probably from old patterns learned in childhood. When a person is defensive, the ability to hear and be willing to change is gone.

Non-verbal ways to communicate are beyond the scope of this article, however they are important ways to give and receive information.

Conflict resolution can be challenging but necessary when opposing points of view prevail in a relationship. Negotiating for a good time to work on problem solving is

a good idea. if both are ready and willing to set time aside and are willing to work on differences.

Next, set some basic rules. I recommend that each person take an allotted time to talk without interruption and the other person listen actively, even take notes if both agree. I suggest 5 minutes each. This will bring several differences out in the open and the next step is to agree which ones to work on together, using the communication skill discussed above, paraphrasing, “I” statements, and feedback.

Negotiate a resolution that both agree on and put that particular issue to bed. Of course any promises made must be honored.

In any relationship we all bring something new.Good ways of communicating can embellish and lead to a mutually enriching relationship with positive skills to resolve differences and share experiences.

Knowing what not to say can be just as important as finding the right words to comfort a loved one when they are grieving. Many of the following sayings might seem on the surface to be the “right” thing to say; after all you have probably heard them said at a funeral. However, to a person grieving these common “words of support” encourage them to deny their true emotions and can be hurtful.

Here are a few sayings to try to avoid:

1. The I’ll be there For You… But Not Really Response.

Call me if you need to talk! (but the person is always too busy to talk to you).

When you are feeling extremely vulnerable, you want to be able to count on friends and family to be there for you. One of the most common stories I have heard from those that are grieving, are that friends and even family often avoid them when they need them the most. Try to do your best to return phone calls and stop by and listen. It may seem difficult at times but it can be truly healing to a friend in need.

2. The Look on the Bright Side Response

Your loss is nothing compared to what I heard in the news the other day, you should be thankful. You are young; you can always have another child. Don’t worry, you can always get remarried. Don’t be sad, they are in a better place now. Your mother lived a long life; you shouldn’t be upset that she passed away.

Grief is unique to each individual. Just because someone else’s life may be more dramatic does not make your friend’s pain any less important to them. Allow your loved one to freely share their personal story.

3. The Overly Negative Response

You must feel so lost. Things are really going to be awful for you for awhile. You poor thing, life will never be the same. You must have a dark cloud over you. How do you think your loved one would feel if they saw you like this? If you were more religious these things would not be happening to you.

Someone who is grieving is already feeling overwhelmed and sad. These negative comments have a way of making someone feel even worse. If you are really trying to sympathize with their feelings, try asking them how they are feeling and allow them to express what they are going through.

4. The Just Get Over It Response

Are you better now? Your loved one passed away so long ago, why are you still upset? Crying and being depressed will not bring your loved one back. Oh it’s just an animal, you can get another one.

Grief is not a disease or a psychological condition you can take a pill for and be cured. You don’t “just get over it”. When you have experienced a loss, you learn day by day to live your life without your loved one but the loss is not erased from your memory. Allow your friend to heal at their own pace.

Wow, so is there anything you can say?

Most people do not consciously say things to be hurtful. They have either heard them said a hundred times so they don’t understand how they might affect someone or they become so nervous about saying the “right” thing that the words come out awkward.

One of the most important things to remember when you are trying to comfort a grieving friend is to not diminish their feelings. Grief is normal. You may become uncomfortable when watching someone go through the deep emotional pain that can occur when someone is grieving, that is normal too. If you desire to be a supportive friend, allow the person to feel the full range of emotions they are feeling – both the celebration of the person’s life and the deep feelings of loss and loneliness. By allowing grief to take its natural progression you will assist your friend reach a sense of balance in their life.

The best thing you can do is keep it simple and heartfelt. Not sure what to say… why not start with asking yourself this simple question… What would you like someone to say to you if you lost a loved one?

Remember to… Hug them, Love them, Show up and Listen. You will do more for your friend by showing up and listening than any words can ever say.

Today, you will learn how to say Happy New Year in Spanish and how to speak Cuban Spanish. This is how to say Happy New Year in Spanish: “Prospero Año Nuevo.” But keep in mind that you can say either “Prospero Año Nuevo” or “Feliz Año Nuevo.” Or as they say in Colombia, “Feliz Año.”

After I wrote a recent article where I included a “foto” and a “receta” for pegao, concon or cucayo (delicacy consisting of crunchy rice that sticks to the bottom of the pot), one reader responded with a very interesting email:

“Muchas gracias, Patrick. BTW, in Cuba, the rice crust at the bottom of thepot is called la raspa, and is a delicacy there, too. Gracias por la receta, tambien. Most people these days just forgo the raspa and use a rice cooker, but I hate accumulating more gadgets! I do use my pressure cooker though.

I do a lot of Cuban cooking. I love it.

We will have a traditional Noche Buena on Christmas Eve with the Lechon Asado that I injected and marinated with mojo for at least 24 hours, yuca con mojo, frijoles negros, arroz, (if you cook the rice and beans together it is called Moros y Cristianos), maybe some platanos maduros fritos (yum), salad, and for dessert flan and maybe some Turrones. I’ve never had Turrones, but it’s part of the traditional Christmas foods. Do you still live in Colombia? I tried to make arepas, but did not get them to cook through properly. Plus, I’m not sure we have the proper harina here. I used the one Mexicans use for tamales and tortillas”

That ends her email.

I wanted to talk about her email with you because I thought it was very interesting. I actually came across the word or phrase “la raspa” on last week, for the first time, when I was researching the Net for “fotos” and “recetas” for pegao, concon or cucayo, and saw that it was the word that cubanos use for crispy layer of rice that is scraped from the bottom of the pot. But I didn’t want to include it in my last article unless a cubano or someone familiar with “la cultura de Cuba” confirmed that “la raspa” is the word used in Cuba for crunchy rice that sticks to the bottom of the pot.

The word “raspa” apparently comes from the verb “raspar” which means “to scrape.”

But I also found her email very entertaining because she said that she forgoes the raspa and uses a rice cooker. I have a rice cooker in my “apartamento” in Medellin, and whenever one of my Colombian amigas visits and cooks rice, they also, out of convenience, forgo the “caldero” (cast iron or cast aluminum cooking pot) and the pegao, concon, cucayo, or raspa. Which I am of course unhappy about since I love eating the crunchy rice that sticks to the bottom of the pot.

And another thing that she mentioned which I felt was also typical of my amigas in Medellín is that she cooks with a pressure cooker.

But when I lived in Barranquilla on the Caribbean coast of Colombia, my “novia” never cooked with a pressure cooker. Instead, she would soak the frijoles overnight to make sure they were soft before cooking them the next day.

But the “paisas” or people of Medellín are a bit more “cosmopolita” than the “costeños” (coastal people) of Barranquilla and prefer the convenience of rice cookers and pressure cookers over “calderos” (cast iron or cast aluminum pots) and regular “ollas” (pots).

So that’s what I wanted to share with you that I learned about the Spanish or culture of Cuba and Colombia.

So many of us are automatically programmed to do the ‘right thing’ when something is asked of us. If we’ve been ‘well brought up’ we may find it hard to resist the temptation to be useful, help others, not disappoint or cause offence. Yet agreeing, not saying how we feel or perhaps saying ‘yes’ when we don’t want to, can eventually lead to us feeling used, unappreciated and resentful.

– When we learn to be assertive and express ourselves well, in an appropriate way, it means that when we do say ‘yes’ to something we’re happy to undertake that extra task, meet up socially, do a favour, take things further. We’re not feeling cajoled, bullied or guilt-tripped. On occasion we may agree to do things we’re not too keen on or stay quiet and bite our tongue. We’ll view it as a trade-off; it may be important to gain brownie points or simply be good manners.

However, if we sense that our acquiescence has become a regular pattern, that others now expect us to always agree, we may need to consider the signals we’re giving. When we express ourselves well it becomes an integral part of establishing balanced relationships. So it’s important to notice if others have begun to view us as a pushover and ‘yes’ is now becoming the most negative word in our vocabulary.

– Saying how we feel means that we’re committed to establishing equal relationships, are keen to be open, honest and comfortable together. When we’re at ease and prepared to give, share and be real about our feelings it helps us build trust and mutual respect, where communication occurs naturally. No one’s keeping a tally of who does good deeds and favours or is having to think before they speak.

If, over time, we notice that we’re the one who’s always helping out, is obliging, saying ‘yes’ when we’d prefer to say ‘no’ and getting nothing in return we may start to feel frustrated and let down. Rarely receiving consideration or a simple ‘thank you’ can signal time to start expressing yourself better and saying how you feel rather more often.

– Remember though that others may not fully appreciate how you’re thinking or feeling. If you’re quiet you may appear sullen, indifferent or in agreement with what’s been decided. Watch for this becoming a pattern in a relationship, especially if one person is dominant or strongly opinionated. The fact that you may have given a massive concession, or made a major investment of yourself may have escaped their notice. They may have asked a question where they expected you to say how you feel and then simply taken you at your word.

I remember a client, a top female manger in a male-dominated national company. She was seriously stressed, working long hours with virtually no free time or personal life. She always said ‘yes’ to her manager because she was concerned that if she didn’t he would assume she wasn’t coping and was perhaps not up to the job. One evening she was driving home from work late at night. Her boss called and asked her to do an urgent report for him.

She’d worked on her confidence and so felt able to readily explain what she was already working on, that she was happy to do the report but needed his input on rescheduling her workload to incorporate the new request. It turned out that he was unaware of her other commitments, was enquiring if she had any spare capacity and was happy to get someone else to do it. She dealt with his request calmly and effectively, expressed herself well and so avoided automatically saying ‘yes’ and ending up working throughout the night.

– Good communications are important. Being open and honest, expressing clearly that you’re happy to do something, want to be supportive, spend time together, but need others to reciprocate, understand and appreciate your point of view is a positive way of investing in your relationships. It’s important to indicate what you want from your partner in return.

– When we feel obligated, pressurised or second-guessed we can start to feel resentful. Always being the ‘good guy’ can wear thin, especially if it becomes apparent that others automatically assume we will go along with their wishes. We can feel unappreciated, disregarded, inconsequential. But if we don’t speak up and say how we feel we have to accept some responsibility for other people’s assumptions. It’s important to deal with a situation before it impacts too much on our relationships.

If this is you, take time to reflect on why you have this mindset, why this pattern has evolved in your relationships. Were your role models people-pleasers, always compliant; was disagreement regarded as argumentative, unattractive, unacceptable; were your views and wishes criticised and dismissed?

– Looking at other people’s relationships and comparing them to our own can be an interesting exercise. Watch how others enjoy adult conversations, discuss their wishes, compromise and negotiate. We can then learn how to modify the way we express ourselves.

Becoming more confident in a positive, assertive way can add significantly to the quality of our relationships, and the spin-off can be that we also improve our relationship with ourselves.

Some say love, it is a river that drowns the tender reed. Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed. Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need. I say love, it is a flower, and you its only seed.

Some say love, it is a river

Have you ever gone down rapids when a river is in flood? It is so exciting and its such a huge rush. Have you ever wandered down a river hand in hand with your partner and watched it flowing silently back and forth from the sea? This lyric is so poignant.

Life is like a river. We are all in this big wash flowing from birth to death and like river we all go over bumps and terrain and we carve out a path that meets the least resistance. Some of us go over bigger obstacles and become giants and are known by the whole world.

But love as a river, it is a river, that drowns the tender reed

Well you can jump in head first and maybe be drowned like a tender reed or you can sail above it and let love be part of your whole life and let it carve a character in you. I have to say I am a different man from a marriage and divorce, but I am a better more forgiving man.

Love is so consuming and it’s risky and if you have been drowned like a reed you may be hesitant to jump in again and sail down that river. But I say jump in and have a swim.

Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed.

One person that was left to bleed is a well known friend of mine. I have spoken to Him all my life and I have met Him in the flesh and had a quarter pounder meal with Him that I bought, and I have seen Him 45 times in visions as an apparition. His name is Jesus Christ and He is still living. In one of the prophets hundreds of years before He became the famous Rabbi on earth, a prophet inspired by God wrote about a promised Messiah and a saviour. This is what the prophecy of the coming One would experience.

Isaiah 52:13-14

13 Behold, My Servant shall deal prudently; He shall be exalted and extolled and be very high. 14 Just as many were astonished at you, So His visage was marred more than any man, And His form more than the sons of men;

Jesus was only young when He knew he was this promised servant and yet this verse said that He was going to beaten to such a state that he was going to be unrecognisable as a man.

Later in the next chapter it speaks of the whipping He would get called stripes.

Isaiah 53:5-6

5 But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed. 6 All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.

One time I saw Jesus in a church in a vision where appeared so clear to me it’s as though He was really a flesh human standing in front of me. He was dressed in a white robe but it was soaked in bright red blood. He turned around and his back was cut to shreds. Just like you dice meat for a curry, his back was in strips of flesh from those whips. Mel Gibson’s “Passion of the Christ” didn’t nearly go as far as what I saw that day in the year 2000.

Some could say the love Jesus had for humanity cut Him like a razor and left Him bleeding on a cross to die. Some believe the myth that Jesus married Mary Magdalene and they had a son, this is essentially saying Jesus was not divine as He came back from death on the third day and the enemy of this world would love to discredit Jesus.

But as the verse read above, All of us like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way;

This breaks the heart of Jesus that people don’t believe in Him and practice what He taught.

Yes love can cut like a razor, but love requires you to take the plunge. Jesus took the plunge, why don’t you buy a New Testament Bible and read the Books of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John and have a look at who we killed. Have a look at what He said and see if you in your own power can obey what He teaches.

Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need.

Love has that effect on you. You can be fine when you have not a person who you fall in love with, but once you are in love you don’t know how you can exist without them in your life. It is a hunger and sadly some people are addicted to their partners and that’s not a healthy sort of love.

We all need love. God loves the prostitutes of this world providing a loving service to all the lonely men in the world who need someone to hold them and to give them comfort and listening ear. I guess that’s why Jesus and Mary got on so well. She found a man that could love her without wanting sex and He found a women that loved Him for who He was, loved to speak to Him and listened to Him preach for hours and gave Him good feedback.

For 20 years I was addicted to the services of prostitutes and so Mary being one and being a good friend of Jesus always appealed to me. In this past year I have met Mary in visions about six times and three of these times I have seen her dance ballet at church to our songs. She is a blessing.

Love is addictive.

I say love, it is a flower, and you its only seed.

What a perfect and wonderful way to look at love. Every love needs an object. That’s why we give love away to cars and cats and dogs so easily as they are not going to hurt us much save when they die or break down. Love has no point when the person we love does not return it, well in most instances. But I have to confess there are actors that I love and I go and see them act in most of their movies and so it can be rewarding with a one sided love.

But very flower needs a seed and then it needs water and sun to grow. And so the best love is a two way love, one that is fed into maturity.

Have you got that sort of love in your life?

It’s the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It’s the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It’s the one who won’t be taken, who cannot seem to give, and the soul afraid of dyin’ that never learns to live.

It’s the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance.

It is truly heartbreaking to hear some stories of how some people have grown up. I have to say I admire ballroom dancing but I have never learned to dance. I am not sure this is the full meaning of her lyric but it is one meaning. Only a girl who never expects to be at a formal wedding doesn’t learn to waltz at some time.

Some people have been so hurt, so spoken ill of, so rejected and unloved that they simply never take a chance on entering the dance of love. That is a sad state.

Then there are people who did take a chance from the group above and they have a marriage or love affair that breaks up and they promise themselves never to take the chance again.

It’s the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance.

We all have dreams as we grow up but how many people see that dream come true? Are we afraid that it will never come true so we never take the chance and make up excuses to ourselves and live our lives in regret? I tell you the truth many people have gone after their dreams and achieved them. You know for a little as six hundred dollars you can get a book published with up to fifty copies? How many people were going to write that book and never have because they think it will be impossible to be published? This month I am going to have my first book published in fact tonight I got the email that said it was ready to be printed.

That has been a life long dream of mine. In six months I have written a 130 articles and 28,000 people have read them, and my first book is 66 of those articles. So I am not going to a traditional publisher but I think enough people will order my book and be blessed and pass it on to their loved ones to read. And in a few weeks I will be published author, how exciting it that?

It may not be to you but for me it’s so exciting.

Take that chance on your dream. Go and read “Finding your destiny in Billy Joel’s Piano man lyrics” from the expert author link below for more on destiny.

It’s the one who won’t be taken, who cannot seem to give,

There are so many people that are takers in this world. So many of us are so afraid of being used that we won’t open up and give freely. You can’t live like that. You have to be able to give. You have to take the chance that you are going to be taken advantage of, you just need to give.

and the soul afraid of dyin’ that never learns to live.

One time Jesus walked across a lake in the middle of the night and the followers of His froze with fear thinking they were seeing a ghost. When Jesus said it was Him, Peter asked could he come and walk on the water and Jesus said, “Sure come.” And Peter walked on water for a while.

On that night Peter was obviously not afraid to walk on a rough blown lake. We have to be fearless and that is so hard in a world where we are constantly assaulted with bad news that teaches us not to take a risk.

Most people reject the Christian faith as they see it as so limiting. And yet when asked they will readily agree that the Jesus they knew of was a nice person. Most people are simply afraid of dying to the way they live currently and therefore miss out on a relationship with the one person that called Himself the life.

John 14:6

6 Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me. This is a profound statement by Jesus the young Rabbi. The whole world is searching for meaning to life, they are searching for direction and purpose, and they search for truth that makes sense. And most people want to go to heaven when they die and meet God.

Yet few people submit to Jesus and become a follower and step out onto the lake called the Christian life like Peter did that night.

I encourage you to approach a Christian your respect and show them this article and tell them you’d like to check out Jesus more with them. Have them explain the teachings of Jesus to you.

When the night has been too lonely and the road has been to long, and you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong, just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snows lies the seed that with the sun’s love in the spring becomes the rose.

When the night has been too lonely and the road has been to long and you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong,

Life for the unloved and rejected people in this society can be quite lonely and the road of life can become very long. Depression and even clinical depression can set in and this makes suicide in many people’s minds seem very attractive. I have been there three times on the precipice of jumping off a bridge.

Sometimes we get to thinking that love is only for the lucky and the strong people of this world. We often think success only comes to the strong and the lucky also, but look at me a self confessed former sex addict, I am publishing my first book and soon I will have double the articles on the web and I am so happy.

And I am neither a lucky man nor one that is particularly strong. My one strength has been a verse in the Bible.

Romans 8:28

28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

This verse is a very powerful verse for a Christian who understands it. It means good and bad no matter what it is that happens, will somehow turn out for good. It means all the bad things in my life will have a happy ending if I continue to love God and do what He tells me to do. And yes God speaks to me and gives me things to do and gives me directions how to do each thing. He even inspires me what to write.

The book was his idea when I had written 40 articles and even the title was His title that He gave me.

just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snows lies the seed that with the sun’s love in the spring becomes the rose.

In Australia where I live it does not snow and in fact I have only seen snow in pictures, so this lyric would have more meaning to your North Americans that see snow. Bitter snow must be so depressing. Depression is like that I imagine. There just seems to be no end to it but Bette Midler wants us to remember when all hope seems lost you are the seed and when enough sun comes you can find love and purpose in your life.

You can find love in life. There are so many people that are willing to have friends. You just need to go and find some lonely people like you. Perhaps you’ll find them in a pub.

I have to warn you that even church can be a lonely place and Christians sometimes can seem so unloving. Jesus was not like that. Jesus had time for every person and so make sure you get to know some genuine Christians. Start with that one that you already like.

Have a good day. I hope my mumblings have helped you.

Can I pray for you?

Dear Father

I ask that you bless this reader for reading so far. If they have read everything that I have written here, I pray that you give them the courage to seek out that Christian that they know and like and take them a print out of this article. Father I pray that you lead this person into relationship that helps them and helps them start to dream again. I pray that your Holy Spirit would guide them to books and teach them as they read the Bible to the time that they want to take the leap of faith into the river like Peter and risk their life on following you.

In Jesus name I ask Amen

Be blessed

Love Matthew

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. But if you can say something nice – DO! Lisa Ryan

It was my mom’s 70th birthday and we drove down to Atlanta (twelve hours) to spend it with her. In my “ideal perfect world,” I knew that I wanted to spend the day at the spa with my mom. However, because of my speaking schedule, I did not have the time to actually book an appointment in advance.

If you’ve ever tried to book a spa appointment for a particular day, you know how difficult it can be, so imagine trying to book TWO same day spa appointments. I was on the phone early on Saturday, calling difference spas and telling the receptionist what I wanted. Most of them practically laughed in my face, “Honey, we are booked up through the end of next month,” was the general attitude.

Finally, in desperation, said out loud, “I need a spa and I need one NOW!” The next website that came up was a spa right in my mom’s town. Their website was unimpressive and I would not have chosen it if I was not desperate. I called the number and Silvia answered the phone.

I told her, “Today is my mom’s 70th birthday and I’d like to take her to the spa.” Silvia replied, “We just had a cancellation, we would love to create the perfect day for your mother.” I said, “Well, I’d like to come with her, can you do two appointments?” She said, “Of course we can.” I really wanted two facials, but because of the technicians that they had working that day, we would have to have one facial and one massage – no problem, massage for mom, facial for me (my favorite service anyway.)

Then Silvia said, “We can even provide both services for each of you.” I said, “Really, we can have BOTH a massage AND a facial???” By that time, Silvia had created such a high expectation for the day that I didn’t even ask the price, I just said, “Sign us up.” We got into the car and drove to our appointments.

Silvia greeted us at the door and brought us into the “Relaxation Room.” She directed my mother to a chair that already had a birthday balloon tied to it and a card ready for her, signed by the staff. She took off our shoes and put our feet up on the lounge chair. She then asked us what we would like to drink. We both ordered raspberry lemonade which she promptly provided. After handing us our drinks, she left and brought my mom a tray with assorted goodies – grapes, cheese, crackers, cookies and chocolate. As she offered my mother her tray, she said, “It is my pleasure and an honor to serve you.” She then put together my tray and handed it to me in the same fashion. Wow!

We did not carry our purse or take on or off our shoes all day. The services were far beyond expectation and my mom said it was “the BEST birthday ever.” Mission accomplished.

On the way out to the car, my mother asked me, “Did you notice the bathroom?” I exclaimed, “YES!” Every single time my mother or I used the restroom, the wastebasket had been emptied. It was perfectly clean. The attention to detail was amazing and by taking care of everything, Silvia and the rest of the team created a day that was in a word – Perfect.

What does all of this have to do with your business?

1. Think about how your phone is answered. Do you treat “silly questions” as if they truly are ridiculous, or do you look for a “Yes, and” solution to make the situation work for you and your potential client. Smiling while answering the phone works. I could hear Silvia smiling through the phone.

2. When you provide a product or service, do you consider it an “honor” to be of service to your clients? Do you convey that in your tone of voice and come at your business from the place of a servant heart? When Silvia first uttered, “It is my honor and a privilege to serve you,” I had no doubt in my mind that she meant every word.

3. What details are you missing? Is there something you can do that is so simple and yet so unexpected that it leaves an indelible impression? It may have taken Silvia three seconds to remove the paper towels from the waste basket between clients, yet that minor detail stood out above everything else. It showed what an amazing experience they were able to create just by paying attention.

Take inventory of your thoughts, words, feelings and actions as you go through your day. Your clients don’t need to know what kind of day you’re “really” having, all they need to do is experience the heart of a servant and the desire to take care of them in the best possible way – details included.

Have fun,

Lisa

Don’t underestimate the power of your thoughts, feelings and words, EVERYTHING you do makes an impression, whether it’s positive or negative.

It is hard to find too many people today that have not been impacted by the costs and the additional family burdens of Long-Term Care. The advances in medical science bring longevity. With longevity comes the costs and burdens of aging. These health issues can be from illnesses, accidents or just the impact of aging.

Caregiving is always hard on family members. You really can’t depend on a spouse since if you are older so is your spouse. Adult children will have their own careers, families and responsibilities. A new poll by the Associated Press-NORC Center for Public Affairs Research that says many young adults are already providing long-term care services for older loved ones. It is not easy for them.

The poll indicates one-third of American adults under age 40 have already provided care for elder family members, and another third expect to be called upon to do so within the next five years.

Many people are aware the United States Department of Health and Human Services says if you reach the age of 65 you have a 70% chance of needing some type of long-term care service and support before you pass-away.

This means this is less an “if” and more a “when” and “how long”.

The better statistic is this one: it will either happen or it won’t.

If this happens you will be responsible for either finding a family member to provide care or purchasing care, either at home or in a facility. The clear majority of long-term care services are custodial in nature. This means you need help with normal activities of daily living or require supervision due to a cognitive problem like Alzheimer’s or dementia.

Health insurance or, when you are 65, Medicare and your Medicare Supplement, will pay for only 100 days of skilled care services. This is why long-term care is such a problem.

Yet, some financial planners and insurance agents would rather you not explore Long-Term Care Insurance. Many don’t understand the product, underwriting, policy design and the power of the Long-Term Care Partnership Program which is available in 45 states.

Why? There are several reasons. Some are just ignorant of the facts. However, most of them are very aware of the impact of the financial costs and burdens of aging. So why not Long-Term Care Insurance?

There is a huge misperception of the cost of policies. You may have even read some of the articles. They point to high premiums or premium increases over the time.

The fact is premiums are very affordable for most people. Sure, if you are 75 when you get a policy the premium will be based on that age and your health at age 75. However, people are adding Long-Term Care Insurance to their retirement plan prior to retirement with the bulk being in their 50s. Most of my clients are age 45 to 67. At these ages premiums are very affordable, especially if you are in good health and your policy is designed correctly.

Policy design is critical. Most claims are for care at home which usually costs less than a skilled nursing home. Policies pay for quality care in the setting you desire. This includes at home, adult daycare, assisted living, memory care as well as a traditional nursing home.

The American Association for Long-Term Care Insurance says most claims are for services at home. The major companies, in 2017, paid over $9.2 Billion in benefits to American families. The policies work and work very well. They give families choice and reduce the tremendous burdens placed on loved ones.

Partnership Long-Term Care policies provide additional dollar-for-dollar asset protection. This means you can buy just enough long-term care benefit to safeguard your assets without having to over-purchase and spend too much.

Some insurance agents and financial planners may want you to purchase expensive life insurance policies instead… or even worse… do nothing and self-insure.

There are a handful of outstanding “hybrid” policies available. These are life insurance policies or annuities specifically designed for long-term care. For some people this could be the best solution. But usually, a general insurance agent or financial planner is not the person to speak to about these options.

You need an experienced long-term care specialist. There are a handful of specialists nationwide. These are people, like myself, who represent all the major companies, understand policy design and underwriting, know the power of the partnership program and have processed claims so they know how polices actually get used.

In my case I have thousands of clients nationwide in the 20 years I have been helping people plan for aging. Remember, premiums are based on your age and health at the time of application as well as the amount of benefits you wish to have. These policies are custom designed, which is why you need a specialist who works with all the major companies to help you find appropriate coverage.

So how about premium increases. Yes, it is true older policies sold decades ago have had premium increases. These “legacy” policies were priced and marketed prior to rate stabilization rules that are now in place in most states.

Today’s Long-Term Care Insurance policies have underwriting which is much more scientific and conservative than ever before. Premiums now consider low interest rates, low lapse rates and actual claims experience as well. Today’s Long-Term Care Insurance plans have a much smaller chance for premium increases in the future according to the Society of Actuaries.

Regardless of those facts, it is not easy for insurance companies to raise rates on the products being sold today. This should give consumers a lot of peace-of-mind as they plan a way to safeguard savings and reduce the burdens extended care placed on their loved ones.

Perhaps the biggest difference between a specialist in long-term care and a financial planner or general insurance agent is that they look at Long-Term Care Insurance as only a financial decision. Yes, money is important. However, a Long-Term Care specialist knows this is all about family, your family.

Without a plan that addresses your future longevity, your family will be responsible for everything. The first thing the adult children of my clients tell me at the time of claim is that their Mom or Dad’s policy gave them the ability to be family. They are always grateful for the help which allowed them to be loving and supporting. This way they can spend quality time with Mom or Dad and not worry about where the money is coming from or worse, having to provide the care themselves.

Working with a Long-Term Care specialist will allow you to get the accurate information you seek. There are several reference websites for research:

LTC News offers articles and resources: http://www.ltcnews.com

US Department of Health and Human Services: https://longtermcare.acl.gov/

Long-Term Care will impact you, your family, your savings and your lifestyle. Long-Term Care Insurance is Easy and Affordable Asset Protection. These plans not only protect your savings but reduce the burdens placed on family members. Allow your financial planner to deal with your mutual fund, stocks and bonds. That is their expertise. Allow a general insurance agent to get you the best deal on your home and auto insurance. But for long-term care, seek the help of an expert. Act before you retire to take advantage of lower premiums and your overall better health.