I awakened this morning reflecting on last night’s sadness as I watched my son slumped over his bed, face buried in the covers to muffle his cries. I approached him and he raised his head enough to say, “no.” As he resisted and turned his head away, I cradled my arms about his arched back, holding him while he clutched tightly to his bed.

When a son’s heart is broken, what does a mother do? It’s not like a skinned knee that you can spray Bacteen on, give him a kiss, and scoot him back outside to play. It’s different. His cries were of deep sorrow. Though I wanted to know what had crushed him so, I chose to lay my cheek on his head and rub his shaking form.

I, like many women, have accused men of being cold and without feelings. This perception shriveled in the rawness of this moment. In her article, You Just Don’t Understand, Deborah Tannen, Ph.D. elaborates on the differences in how men and women communicate. She says, “For women, talking about troubles is the essence of connection. I tell you my troubles, you tell me your troubles, and we’re close. Men, however, hear troubles talk as a request for advice, so they respond with a solution.” Yet, in this case, the behaviors described were not characteristic. My son relished long talks with his girlfriend, esteeming the sharing of private thoughts and feelings as substantive. Imagine his disappointment – “after all we’ve shared” – at the break up. Perhaps movies like “Coming to America,” where the prince listens as his love interest shares details of her previous romantic relationship, were an influence. Or possibly, being raised by a single mother may have affected his perceptions. Since most guys move toward problem solving, maybe he saw himself as the solution.

His muffled moans and howls gave way to garbled utterances. I couldn’t see his face, but I felt it in his body. He tensed, shook his head and slammed the floor. The whimperings became growls. I had never seen my son filled with such rage. I encouraged him to talk about it – not to keep the anger inside. He resisted at first, saying he didn’t want to talk about it. I continued to stroke his back and gently insist; he didn’t need to keep this inside. With a pressured voice, he recounted the phone conversation. The son, whom I had taught to treat others with dignity and respect, had been handled so irreverently.

Pain is pain. It doesn’t discriminate. And though I don’t know how a teenage boy processes his pain, I do know the feelings. Sure, our situations were different, yet the pain was just as real. That’s why I’d never minimize his experience as puppy love. A puppy may not be able to articulate the pain it feels, but the pain is just as intense. Come to think of it, I can remember some pains that reduced me to the fetal position. Don’t we sometimes become as children when overwhelmed?

I was fearful of his state. My mind flashed back to a time when I too felt the sting of betrayal. Someone whom I trusted left me for another. The feelings of abandonment gave way to desperation. I struggled to breathe. My son’s rocking reminded me of the internal chaos. More importantly, it reminded me of my susceptibility to retaliation while in that state.

My son lamented that he’s been there for everybody, yet he is the one who always ends up hurt. “I was there, through everything,” he yelled, “and she does me like this?” He kept repeating how tired he was. I could have joined him in blaming his friend, but that would have only served to antagonize his feelings of betrayal. Break ups are painful. There is always something that triggers it. Even the ones that appear to be good breakups are only public presentation. Most times, some tears were shed when no one was looking. There is always a dumper and a dumpee. Someone always feels let down.

The pressure built in my son’s body again and his chocolate skin reddened. He started blowing and groping. At that point, I knew I had to de-escalate him. Such anger was not good for anyone. It was the kind that fuels explosiveness. I coached him to breathe slowly and deeply, in and out. His breaths were snorted as he tried to overcome his emotions to try. I continued to coax. The tension lessened in his body, then I asked him to listen to me.

“People are flawed.” These were the words I said to my son. Human beings make mistakes. I could tell he was listening. Different from earlier rantings of injustice, his body began to heave slowly as large tears rolled down his cheeks. “That’s right,” I said, “get it out.” My eyes filled with tears as he started shaking. He was in such pain. A pain that his previous anger was avoiding.

What salve can a mother rub on her son’s wounded heart? Is there any medicinal value to words when the pain is so great? I don’t know. What I did know, however, was I couldn’t leave his wound unattended. I asked my son to listen. “Every girlfriend you have had has cared about you. They weren’t pretending. They, like you, are trying to figure out feelings. I know it hurts. It hurts bad. Someone you trusted disappointed you. But you have a choice. You can choose to heal and grow, or you can let this poison you and make your heart callous. Love heals wounds. Anger does not.”

Relationships end. My heart goes out to teenagers, struggling to separate who they are from social pressures. There’s bound to be chaos. This is my only child, so I don’t have previous experience to aid me. Despite my good intentions, I’m certain that I said some things that didn’t help – might have even made him feel worse. God knows, I don’t have the answers. Nevertheless, I believe that if I stay open and ask, the answer will come. So, I’m asking.

Taking the kids to the playground is a great avenue for them to get a breath of fresh air and let them exercise through engaging in active play. Particularly now that we live in a gadget-driven era, the playgrounds serve as a wonderful place for children to have a screen-free entertainment.

However, parents must be aware about some unseen dangers that are present in the playgrounds. Did you know that according to a study, 50 percent of the equipments in the playground are contaminated with some sort of illness-causing bacteria? Moreover, these playground equipments are also found to be contaminated with tads of sweat, urine, saliva, mucus and blood. Yikes! Turned out, average playgrounds are not so clean and can become the breeding grounds for all types of germs.

So, how do you ensure that your children’s exposure to these disease-causing contaminants are eliminated or minimized? Here are 8 practical tips every parent should know about.

1) Practice Good Hand Washing Before and After Playing

Teach your kids the importance of proper hand washing before and after playing. This habit works in two ways – helping your child combat the germs contaminating the playground equipments and in the same way protecting other children from getting into contact with the germs your kid might have.

2) Carry Along Some Wet Wipes With You

Bring along wet wipes with you which can come in handy when you need to wipe your kids’ hands clean and there is no water source around. You can also use the wet wipes to wipe down the equipments your child will most likely get contact with.

3) Use Microfiber Towel for Quick Cleaning

Maybe you and your family have decided to enjoy a picnic while out in the park, and you need to clean the picnic table in a breeze before you place the foods on top of the table. A microfiber towel can easily do the trick. Just spray on an environment-friendly cleaning spray on the towel to wipe the area clean.

4) Stay Away from Indoor Playgrounds

Sure, germs are lurking around in both indoor and outdoor playgrounds. But, indoor playgrounds are enclosed and germs of different types, including those bacteria that are known to cause meningitis, are easily trapped inside. Hence, no matter how much you want to keep the kids out even for just a few minutes while you do your groceries, avoid using indoor play areas such as those in the malls or restaurants.

5) Teach Your Kids to Avoid Putting Their Hands In Their Mouth and Nose

Teach your kids as early as possible to ditch the habit of putting their hands in their mouth or nose. Touching their mouth, nose and other facial areas with unclean hands is a surefire way of germ transfers.

6) Encourage Kids to Practice Proper Sneezing Habits

Children should learn how to cough or sneeze safely to avoid spreading the germs to others. Tell them to cough into their elbow or use a tissue should they need to sneeze rather than using their hands because doing so will only spread the saliva and mucus, along with the germs, as soon as they touch the playground equipments.

7) Stay Protected with a Handy Nasal Sanitizer

The nose can be an easy portal for disease-causing germs. You can give your children extra line of defense from common playground germs and contaminants by using easy-to-carry-around nasal sanitizer available in the market now. No nasal sanitizer available? Try applying a small coating of petroleum jelly around their nostrils area instead.

8) Start a Campaign to Raise Awareness About the Harmful Germs in the Playgrounds

Children deserve playgrounds that are not only fun but are also health-friendly and safe. Let other parents and the rest in your community know about the importance of a clean and sanitized playground. You can start raising funds that will be used for regular sanitation and disinfection of the equipments in your playground.

Be Cautious, But Avoid Going Overboard!

While it’s every parent’s duty to ensure their kids are protected and healthy, don’t forget to keep the balance and let your kids have fun at outdoor playground equipment. Besides, a little bit of exposure to bacteria is also good for the development of your child’s immune system. So, practice good hygiene along with common sense and let your kids enjoy playtime!

It is not very rare that parents start to act like children when it comes to their child participating in a sport, and parents have been seen performing embarrassing acts such as booing an umpire or yelling at a child for missing the winning goal.

Not only can this embarrass a child, but it can also leave the child with emotional distress that they do not know how to deal with. No matter what the parent does, the child can loose confidence when they do not have supportive sports parents up in the stands cheering them on. Behavior like this will leave a child with negative feelings with nobody to talk to about them.

Being supportive sports parents is very important in a child’s development, because they need to learn that it is okay to fail occasionally. Children can start playing sports at an early age, and it is important that they learn the correct behavior for their parents and themselves early on.

Children soak up everything that their parents give to them, so seeing a parent yelling in the stands is something a child will consider normal behavior if their parents are doing it as well. Supportive sports parents must teach their children how to act in various situations, and the most effective way to teach is to act as an example.

There are many ways that parents can be supportive when their child participates in sports, as long as they are willing to be a role model to their child. It is always a good feeling when your child wins the game for the team or scores the most goals, but these types of behaviors should not be expected from a child. Children should always be encouraged to do their best, but never push themselves or feel overwhelmed.

As a supportive sports parent, you need to always praise your child no matter how well they performed. Although some constructive criticism is always helpful, supportive sports parents should never discourage their child or make them feel like a disappointment.

Although a simple argument between a parent and a coach may seem harmless, this is not always the case. Some sport altercations have even leaded to death, which would cause much more emotional stress on those involved.

A child could loose their father to a jail sentence or maybe even death, just because of a little league baseball game that went wrong. It can be pretty easy to be upset at a child not being the star of the team, but it is much harder to suffer the consequences. By acting as a role model and encouraging your child, you can be a supportive sport parent to your child.

March 13, 2005, a Sunday, was like so many Sundays in the 2003 – 2007 period. Well, every second one. After picking my daughters up on a Friday afternoon I’d return them to their mother on a Sunday afternoon.

It was always hard.

Without exception, having helped settle them in with Mum, including a healthy handover chat, I’d leave either forlornly accepting of what was (that they couldn’t be with me fulltime), or, especially in the case of longer stays or absences, I’d leave and only be a minute down the road and in tears.

Those times I was in tears, I would pray to God and just be as earnest as I could be. It was like an immediate sense of separation loneliness gripped me, for the umpteenth time, where I would once again learn that God was all I had. He took me to desolate nothingness so many times. Yet, I never really got used to it.

I came to a place each and every time that acknowledged, with my Lord, I could endure this.

I don’t know how to explain how my relationship with God grew so much in a season of such anguish. It sounds wrong to say God was all I had, but truly there were so many occasions where I found myself dropped literally into that agonising pit. And there, in the bottom of it with me, was my Lord.

Church certainly became a distraction and serving in leadership was one way of getting me to focus on something positive, but there was nothing to distract me on that thirty-minute drive home, and on many occasions, I simply lamented what I was missing out on, and especially how my daughters might be missing me. This latter thought often haunted me, but I was always reassured to know on phoning them later that they were always okay.

On the day in question, my journal tells me that my youngest daughter glanced back, and I seriously questioned, as it says, ‘Where I’m at!’ I simply mention that saying goodbye that day was ‘very difficult.’

Long stays were different. Having my daughters for a week during the holidays was great, but a strange thing would happen the day before I took them back – I would always be emotional. Sometimes moody, mostly pre-occupied, always reflective. It was just another iteration of a grief I experienced hundreds of times back in that nearly-four-year season, just more intense. It would be nothing for me to be sullenly depressed for two or three days or before I saw them again.

It was a tragic irony for me that I probably took my three daughters for granted whilst I was in my first marriage, but then when it was over, having fallen in love with them in a fresh way through their frequent absences from my presence, I just didn’t know how to adjust, other than to go deep into God – to say it was a saving grace would be a cosmic understatement.

Why do I write this sort of thing? A love letter to my daughters – Dad will always love you. A reminder to myself, that though I’m through that season, there are people doing it tough like I was, but now. An encouragement to those who relate not to give up; you’re not alone. That this love letter might open the eyes of hearts that God destines to see it, especially husbands like I was, taking the very blessings before my/our eyes for granted.

Estate planners use the term “natural objects of one’s bounty” to refer to those individuals who would be expected to receive a share of a person’s estate upon his or her death. Normally, the natural objects of a person’s bounty are members of the immediate family who would take a share of the estate if the person died without a will. For example, if a woman has a husband and three children, those four individuals are presumed to be the natural objects of her bounty. In the majority of cases, children expect to take equal shares of their parent’s estate. There are occasions, however, when a parent decides to leave more of the estate to one child than the others or to disinherit one child completely. A parent can legally disinherit a child in all states except Louisiana. This article describes reasons why a parent might consider disinheriting a child and suggests some less drastic alternatives that parents might consider.

Reasons for Disinheriting a Child

Disinheritance of a child is not as rare as some might think. Here are some reasons a parent might have for omitting a child from his or her will.

– Lack of need. A parent may exclude a child from the will because the other children are more in need of assistance. For example, if the children are a brain surgeon, a social worker, and an undiscovered artist, the parent may leave everything to the social worker and the artist because the brain surgeon is able amply to provide for her own family.

– Child provided for already. A parent may have provided more assistance to one child than to the other children during life. For example, if the parents put the brain surgeon through college, medical school, and other training, the parents may feel that child has already received her share of the family’s wealth.

– Dependent parent. An elderly father lives with his daughter and her family in his declining years. She takes care of his affairs, drives him to medical appointments, and otherwise provides for his needs. If it were not for the daughter’s support, the father would be forced to live in a nursing home. Two sons live out of state and rarely visit their father. In gratitude for his daughter’s assistance, the father may decide to leave all his property to her, with the sons taking little or nothing.

– Estrangement. A father has two sons and a daughter. The daughter and one son excelled in school, attended college, and followed in their father’s footsteps of military service. The other son dropped out of high school and lived with a series of women while holding odd jobs. The father, a high-ranking officer, believes that the son’s failures reflect poorly on their entire family. The father advises the son that he is not welcome in the family any longer. The son drifts away to another state and the estrangement lasts for years. The father leaves all his estate to the successful son and daughter, completely omitting the other son.

– Disabled child. A family has three children, one of whom has autism. It is not clear whether the child with autism will ever be able to lead an independent life. The parents’ greatest fear is what might happen to their son after they are both dead. Rather than dividing up their property into three equal shares, the parents decide to leave all or most of their property in a special needs trust for the son with autism.

– Controlling parent. A domineering mother has one child, a son. During his entire life, the son never failed to live up to his mother’s high expectations. After college and law school, the son falls in love with a free-spirited woman who takes drugs on occasion and makes a meager living writing poetry and short stories. The mother strongly disapproves of the relationship and disinherits her son because the son marries the woman without her consent. The mother leaves her entire estate to nieces and nephews.

– Work ethic. A parent from a poor background puts himself through college and graduate school. He founds a company and makes millions with a public offering. The father believes that his children should make the same sort of effort that he did rather than living off his wealth for the rest of their lives. The father leaves $100,000 to each child and donates the rest to charity.

Cautionary Note

The disinheritance of a child is not to be taken lightly because it can be an intensely emotional step on both sides. Parents who make a will disinheriting a child may feel guilty about it for the rest of their lives. A child who does not find out about being disinherited until after the parent’s death may be devastated to learn of the parent’s rejection.

Keep in mind that a will does not become effective until the testator dies. Many things can take place during the interim period. For example, a mother and daughter who have been estranged for years may reconcile in the days or hours before the mother’s death. The mother may state in front of witnesses in her hospital room that she regrets disinheriting her daughter and that she now wishes for the daughter to share in her estate. Unless the mother revokes or amends her will, however, her oral statements cannot vary the terms of the written will.

Irreconcilable differences cause a father to disinherit a 20-year-old son and all the son’s descendants. All his property is left to two other children. Subsequently, the son marries and has a child. The birth of the grandchild changes everything. The father now wants the disinherited son’s share to go to the grandchild. If time permits and the father does not procrastinate, he can execute a codicil to the will that provides for the grandchild. If the will is not amended, the both the child and the grandchild will be omitted.

Conclusion

Some say that disinheriting a child is unnatural or even immoral. It is advisable not to judge, however, because looking at a family situation from the outside in does not always reveal the true picture. Even if everyone involved agrees that the disinheritance of a child is unfair, the parent has the right to dispose of his or her property in any legal manner in which he or she sees fit.

What do you know about your teenager? Teens world sometimes get very complex and difficult to understand. Several changes occurs in children as they grow from been kids into teens and what we know about our children often determine how well our relationship goes with them. Amongst the so many things we need to know a few of them are essential in helping us getting out of their faces into their hearts. The following seven points are just few among the several important things we need to know about our children and especially teenagers.

1. Know what kind of parent you want to be. This has been referred to as

parental reflection, it reveals why or what are the driving forces of your

behaviour as a parent. Fear, failure and disappointments can be great obstacles to genuine parental reflection.

Parents who don’t reflect often experience no growth or improvement in their

relationship with their children, responses to their children based on their

parental needs, emotional distance from these kids.

2. Know how your teenager perceives the world around them. To succeed in

doing this, parents must understand changes their kids and teens are going

through. These changes in them also changes what the world around them

expects from them.

3. Know changes expected from your teens by world around them as they grow. Changes in appearance, thought pattern, and relationships with others around

them.

4. Know the changes your teens see in the world own around. These includes

changes in their understanding of what is called reality, changes in how things

can turn out to be or what life may bring their way and how they can survive

them.

5. Know how changes in world around affect children. These changes around

often affect their self confidence, steadiness and feeling of been secured.

6. Know that there are certain unseen forces that move teens into action.

Teen’s action though highly unfathomable are influenced by certain guiding

principles, fundamental beliefs, and past experiences.

7. Know that changes that are emotional, intellectual, physical and spiritual in

children may cause a gradual separation & distance between children and

parents. Though these changes appear to be natural they are alarming to parents.

In a society where money-making, powerful careers, and hiding problems to ensure social acceptance are seen as being so important, bringing a child into the world and raising her to the best of your ability is incredibly under appreciated. You are a parent, and that is something to be very proud of. Your willingness to improve your parenting techniques means you can hold your head high, encouraged by the fact that you are open to positive changes, and actively seeking to improve your child’s life by absorbing knowledge and applying it to your child raising methods.

All of us are different in our approach to bringing up children, and everybody’s experience of raising a child is unique. We all have different standards of family values, and different opinions of what is acceptable and what is not. First-time parents often experience doubt in their ability to raise their child correctly, but even very experienced parents be uncertain about their child raising methods.

You might be proud and delighted to show off your brand new baby, blissfully unaware of how tough it could be in the future, but willing and able to face any challenge that lies ahead. Maybe you are feeling alone and trapped, with your demanding child innocently destroying any chance you have at any sort of personal time. You might be suffering as a new parent because of pressures beyond your control, or feeling fantastic as you battle through one of the most unpredictable, frustrating, and rewarding experiences of your life.

A willingness to improve your methods is a parenting strength.

There is nothing wrong with admitting you need good quality advice and then searching for it online. In fact, understanding that you may need help to improve your parenting, and not considering yourself an expert, is likely to mean you are already better parent than you think. Parents who think they are faultless are often ignorant to their own flaws. A parent who is willing to change and improve is likely to enhance the quality of life for everyone involved. Needing help to provide a better standard of living and an improved atmosphere should not be seen as a weakness at all.

With the power of the Internet you can search online and find excellent advice, amazing tips, and even complete parenting plans that will take your child raising to a whole new level of success. Often a problem with your child that was puzzling you will be solved very quickly once you begin sifting through the wealth of information available. One handy hint could be all that is needed for huge positive changes. Parents who need more than a few pointers will find that the Internet will provide instant help, long-term support, and recommended techniques to overcome almost any issues.

It is important to remember that you are not alone in your quest to enhance your parenting techniques. There are online support groups for just about every type of parenting problem, where you will be welcomed warmly and encouraged to talk about your issues with other parents who understand how you feel. The willingness of others to share the methods they used to overcome their child raising difficulties has led to some fantastic parenting guides available on the Internet. These excellent guides will show you methods that will give you the most success in your circumstances, and because you are the type of parent who is open to improvement, you can move forward with confidence.

Whether it’s simple everyday tips or complete guidance from all child raising strategies, the Internet is there for you to use to your advantage, taking the best advice you can find and using your new skills to give yourself and your child the best future you possibly can.

Many schools are now reaching beyond the academic needs of the child in a effort to support the whole family as a unit. They continue to look for innovative ways to address the holistic needs of their students and families. One way schools are doing this is to open and operate Parent Centers that get everyone involved in the social and academic growth of the students.

The goal of a Parent Center is to support and encourage healthy development of families and students. It helps to create a strong sense of community spirit. The centers are usually run on a non-profit basis and are open to all families. Many are found on the school campus or someplace near by. Some schools designate a school classroom to the center.

General, once a month, school principals will have parent gatherings or meetings with parents within the center. This offers a great opportunity to share ideas, needs, and concerns with the principal. It also establishes open communication between the home and the school. Many resources, programs and support groups are available for families through the center. Some centers have after school programs, family literacy activities and other family oriented activities for families to enjoy.

Parents are able to meet with each other and be made to feel welcome. New friendships are established and the center creates an outlet for parents to come together and get involved. They are able to share and express ideas that could be used for the enhancement of the school and the students. The centers usually have a couple of liaison officers that are assigned to parents.

Man parent centers offer a variety of workshops throughout the year as well. Usually parent classes or training is made available in order to help the parents become better parents and to support the learner. The key focus is to maximize the learning experience of the children at the school.

In New Zealand this concept has been around for years, one particular group has been in operation for sixty years. The group has six national programs going on in each of the centers. The strong focus here is educating parents in parenting their children. Here volunteers offer their time at each of the venues in order to make the program a success. Speakers are invited to speak on a broad range of topics to help parents and students. Newsletters are sent out regularly to inform people of the educational programs on offer. Parents are advised to register early in order to ensure attendance.

Why do parents need tips on how to start this conversation with their kids when they ask, “where do babies come from?”

Could it be that they are scared? What are they scared of?

I know I was until I asked myself, “why am I scared to talk with my child about sex?” I realized that all the reasons I was scared to talk to my children about sex had nothing to do with reality. I was scared only because of what I was imagining.

An imagined conversation:

– “Where do babies come from?”

– “Inside Mommy’s tummy.”

– “How do they get there?”

– “There are seeds inside mommy, just like there are seeds inside of fruits.”

This could be the end of the conversation or it could go on.

The point is to answer the question as truthfully and as simply as possible given the age of the child.

Once a child is aware of their genitals, there is nothing wrong with explaining how “the seeds inside of Mommy” get fertilized.

What are we so afraid of? What do we imagine would happen if we told our child about sex? Are we afraid that it would make them want sex? Or what?

There is nothing really to be afraid of. It is all imagined.

Thus, the primary tip for how to start this conversation is to get past your fear, which is coming from your imagination. Once you can see beyond your fear, you can listen literally to what your child is asking and answer appropriately to the actual question, not to what you imagine the question is getting at.

Notice it is not the parent who is starting the conversation. It is up to the child to start it. Children start the conversation by asking the questions. Just answer the actual questions. It is easy to listen when you are free from your fears. Remember, your fears are the result of what you are imagining, not the result of any real danger.

We all believe that having a family that is spouse and kids is so wonderful. You start weaving big dreams for your child right from the day he/she is born. But just giving them food & clothing does not make you a good parent. You can spend money on your child endlessly but it is far more important to invest your time & emotions in them.

The children are like an encyclopedia of questions and you must face all their queries carefully else you might crop in some devilish idea in to their li’l but very mysterious minds.

One of the most important aspects of parenting is to build a self esteem in your child. This way, you child would be able to achieve success in regards of life, irrespective of the field they opt to go for.

Here are some phenomenon & facts as defined by the expert psychologists about building self esteem among children:

1. It is an undeniable fact that until & unless one love themselves to the extent that they realize their strengths & weaknesses & can use these at their best, the individuals can never become successful.

2. In order to live a long & happy life one must have complete trust on them selves and their capabilities.

3. At the end, all these factors turn out to be the ingredients of having contented & full fledged life.

4. The experts have long debated results on the fact that where & how exactly self esteem in the child comes from. While some psychologists are of the view that it is the function of one’s personality that you usually acquire from both the parents. That is, the confident parents generally have confident kids.

5. However, there are psychologists who deny the theory given above and do not believe that genetic play absolutely any role in this regard. They believe that self esteem & confidence are a function of chance. They believe that some people are just born with that high self-esteem and others are born to have low ranges, quite like the intelligence quotients in the individuals.

6. Another very interesting and diversified view on this issue is that self esteem & confidence in a person are defined by their immediate environment & the circumstances. Your personal experience, choice of friends, parental practices, and the discovery of talents are key factors determining the development of one’s self-esteem.

7. The personal experiences of any individual depend on many further facts like:

a. In the form they face the bullying in the school.

b. Their inter-actions in the social group.

The children who have suffered much bullying tend to have a lower self esteem. Similar things apply with the children who remain outside the social group.

8. Another factor that primarily defines the level of development of self esteem in the kids is their parental practice.

a. The kind of examples the parents discuss before the child or the examples they set, influence his thoughts to a great deal.

b. For instance, a child whose parents always make him take his/her decisions all by himself/herself and they trust his decisions would tend to have a very high self esteem inn the long run.

c. As compared to the over protected children and those who are quite coddled by the parents, such kids would have quite better confidence in themselves.

d. The parents who behave very strict with the child or those who make their child feel helpless, their kids are often not able to make their own decisions with confidence.

e. Hence, the parents must watch their behavior with their kids & also what examples they are setting before their children.

9. The social group & friends that the child chooses for himself / herself also plays a major role in developing their personality.

a. In case you become a part of a group that embraces you individuality in all respects & respects their personal opinions as well, this would definitely have a very positive impact on the growth of your confidence & self esteem.

b. Actually the rapid contrast with your social group puts you down as the person.

c. Having a good social group also cushions you against the various threats of the outside forces that you think would destroy and / or lower your self-esteem.

10. Cliques so play a major role as well. In case you are one among the popular of the high school, it strengthens your ego more as compared to the other groups that are ostracized.

11. In case you have some talent or ability that makes you ahead of the crowd, it serves as a strong tool to build your self esteem & confidence.

a. It helps you offer something to the world that they can admire.

b. This admiration would build more trust & confidence of yours on your individuality.

c. The affirmations, accolades & admiration are often treated some great ego boosts for the individuals at all ages.

d. This proves why the people who become personalities owing to their own talents possess a very high self-esteem as compared to the others.

12. Anyways, self esteem must be alive in your personality in all parlance of the life.

a. For instance, you must be a hero for the school circle, but in your other social inter-actions you fail to utter a single word.

b. The fact is that there are just a few individuals who succeed in achieving that apt & right balance of their self-esteem unanimously in all the walks of life.